Sex at the workplace

What sexual experiences have you had at work

  • I've gone to first base with a co-worker at work

    Votes: 15 22.7%

  • I've gone to second base with a co-worker at work

    Votes: 15 22.7%

  • I've gone to third base with a co-worker at work

    Votes: 9 13.6%

  • I've masterbated at work

    Votes: 15 22.7%

  • I've never had sex at work

    Votes: 43 65.2%

  • I've gone to home base with a co-worker at work

    Votes: 8 12.1%
  • Total voters
    66
  • Poll closed .
I think I have only kissed in the workplace. I did do my boss' au pair in his own house when he was on holiday. How does that count?
 
CptStern said:
look at the poll ..yes to all except the "I've never had sex at work"


I met my wife at my previous job :naughty:
Click to expand...

It was getting late at GraphicTech, and Cptstern was burning the midnight oil working on his latest project. First it came as a gentle creak, and then a steady whoosh when the door to his office opened and in peered the petite face of the cleaning lady. CptStern wheeled his chair around to glance at the intruder, and it was at that moment their eyes locked. The rest is sweet sweet history.
 
Most of my jobs have been a variation on the theme "porter" If I ever had the time for work ****ing I'de need the energy to, plus there tends to be a distinct lack of female hotness in a commercial kitchen, hotels on the other hand...



So, no sex, no making out, there was one bint at my last hotel porter job, if she wasn't part time and hence around more often I woulda fancied continuing to chat her up.
 
Never done nuffin' at work. I work with some damn fine ladies, too. I just never attempt moves on them or anything. I'm sure if I were to actually attempt it, I could have had sex at either of my jobs a while ago. Don't really care that much to do so however.
 
I work in an orphanage...




So: basically all the time.
 
I'm a porno star, so it's my job to bang a hot chick every week. :D Nope, never have and that is just way too risky and dumb to do that.
 
I've masturbated at work several times. Good stress reliever.

I hate it when I get it on my clothes though. Then people are asking me why I smell funny. :|
 
Saturos said:
I've masturbated at work several times. Good stress reliever.

I hate it when I get it on my clothes though. Then people are asking me why I smell funny. :|
Click to expand...

And then there's the people who suspect you doing so and videotape you and post it on the internet.
 
I've never noticed my semen, uh, smelling funny.
 
Dragonshirt doesn't bathe often, so when the semen ejects out of his penis, it gets mixed with the smell of BO and leftover food on his clothes. The mixture of semen and the other smells just becomes overwhelming.
 
Jesus Christ that's creepy guys.

After talking to a hot girl and then taking a piss, a few extra shakes is what I was talking about.
 
I'm gonna get a ton of shit for this post and probably get infractioned, but **** it.

ITT Stern flaunts the fact that he's had sex at work and critisizes everyone else. Go ahead, look at his posts.

CptStern said:
also being a dj is more of a gig than a job, just like playing in aband ..unless you're a studio musician full time at a studio with benefits and a goddam secretary ....so you probably should have voted "no"

..however I do concede that if you're a dj at a strip club then it's a job and not a gig because they're there all day everyday ..more of an emcee than a dj
Click to expand...
Way to both be an ass about his profession and show your ignorance. You clearly know nothing about DJing.


*Sigh*
 
CyberPitz said:
Dragonshirt doesn't bathe often, so when the semen ejects out of his penis, it gets mixed with the smell of BO and leftover food on his clothes. The mixture of semen and the other smells just becomes overwhelming.
Click to expand...
Actually, it's just the semen. I bathe twice daily and wear deodorant. :p

Maybe the reason people can sometimes smell it is because it's super-power alien semen. You guys know I'm an alien right?

Raziaar said:
And then there's the people who suspect you doing so and videotape you and post it on the internet.
Click to expand...
Oh well.
 
Where's the 'I have never worked' option?
 
Saturos said:
Actually, it's just the semen. I bathe twice daily and wear deodorant. :p

Maybe the reason people can sometimes smell it is because it's super-power alien semen.
Click to expand...
I just hating get it on me at all. It makes me feel incredibly dirty when it accidentally shoots on my clothes or a little bit drips on my hand. Bleh. However, I don't think it ever smells unless it's a shitload that got on you.


....Never actually tried to smell my own aquamarines.
 
Aquamarines... :LOL:

Aquamarines, gear up and get ready to deploy! GO GO GO!
 
Shamrock said:
I just hating get it on me at all. It makes me feel incredibly dirty when it accidentally shoots on my clothes or a little bit drips on my hand.
Click to expand...

...

I... I won't say anything...

Except that you must have a gigantoid dick, or tiny balls... And I think the latter is more likely...
 
Raz: Yeah I lol'd at that too :LOL:

Vegeta897 said:
I'm gonna get a ton of shit for this post and probably get infractioned, but **** it.

ITT Stern flaunts the fact that he's had sex at work and critisizes everyone else. Go ahead, look at his posts.


Way to both be an ass about his profession and show your ignorance. You clearly know nothing about DJing.


*Sigh*
Click to expand...

Stern's just kind of a troll. It's easier to ignore him than try and argue with him.
 
If an ignored person starts a thread, what happens then?
 
If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?
 
Jintor said:
If an ignored person starts a thread, what happens then?
Click to expand...

div0housetg3.jpg
 
If an ignored person starts a thread, some dude's house implodes.
 
I work at a Holiday Inn and I met this girl there visiting from out of state. I got her number and we talked for awhile. Later that night I porked her in my car. Good times.
 
xombine said:
I work at a Holiday Inn and I met this girl there visiting from out of state. I got her number and we talked for awhile. Later that night I porked her in my car. Good times.
Click to expand...
OMG THATS NOT AT WORK THATS IN UR CAR U MORON

UNLIKE ME I HAD SEX AT WORK MAN ARNT I COOL

:D

:)

:|

/leaves
 
Krynn72 said:
Last option = full sex

Also Japan cares about baseball.

Also i've never had sex at work.
Click to expand...

Last option wasn't there when I posted. It was edited in after.

CptStern said:
first of all I'm canadian and second I forgot home plate so sue me mr dj


also being a dj is more of a gig than a job, just like playing in aband ..unless you're a studio musician full time at a studio with benefits and a goddam secretary ....so you probably should have voted "no"

..however I do concede that if you're a dj at a strip club then it's a job and not a gig because they're there all day everyday ..more of an emcee than a dj

"give it up for lovely Candi, all the way from the heartland ..."
Click to expand...
Actually, DJing was not a gig for me. I was employed by the niteclub, which probably explains why I said "I was a DJ at a popular niteclub for a few years" and not "I did some gigs all over the place for a few years". Besides, anywhere that you are getting payed to be becomes your workplace, so the gig thing was never relevant to your argument anyway.

On a side note, a good friend of mine owns a stripclub, and trust me, DJing at one is not as fun as it sounds. You get sick of the girls there real quick.
 
Never, but by damn I should have when I worked as a lifeguard.
 
A couple of jobs and several relationships, no doubt i got better f*ckfriends at job than in any other place, made for metting people.
 
Saturos said:
I've masturbated at work several times. Good stress reliever.

I hate it when I get it on my clothes though. Then people are asking me why I smell funny. :|
Click to expand...

Wait, what.... :x

*pukes at the thought of dragonshirts smelly disgusting semen*
 
Upside down, my frown is upside down, my frown is upside down...
 
Very disappointing thread.

Very disappointing. So much potential though.
 
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