Some anxiety problems..

AKIRA

AKIRA

Tank
Joined
Feb 6, 2006
Messages
3,000
Reaction score
2
Hey HL2.net..basically I'll keep it as short as I can and just see if you guys can possibly help me out.

Exactly 1 year ago, I went through a pretty weird depression/anxiety phase which lasted about 2 months..it caused me to break up with my girlfriend(which I got back together with last october). I don't know why, or how but it has come back...do you think that it's just bad memories coming back to haunt me? I mean, I had a little breakdown earlier today but I seem to be calm..for now.

This is where the problem is. For some reason...things just look "different" then they did like a week ago and it's the same symptoms that I went through last summer this exact time. I don't know what the cause is but from that, I get depressed a little then from there I get a huge dose of anxiety because my mind keeps racing and telling me that I'm going through the EXACT same phase as I did last year and that soon I'll break up with my gf because of it (which I REALLY don't want to do as I care for her very much) but I just need to find ways to eliminate this anxiety.

I've been to different sites and they come up with decent ways but I can't help but feel that I'll feel ok for only a couple of hours - or maybe a few days then out of nowhere I'll bounce right back to where I was...this is really affecting me and I'm getting pretty rattled about it.

I know I said I'd keep it short so if you want to stop now you can go ahead..what I'm about to write is my exact though process on what happens when this depression/anxiety kicks in:

I'm relatively calm...but then all of the sudden a wave of depression/anxiety comes out of nowhere...I try and get myself out of it telling myself "it's just bad memories". This usually doesn't work so then I try to pinpoint why I feel this way exactly...Things have been happening the same way they have this summer pretty much the same way last summer which causes me to think "this is it, it's happening all over again, you're ****ed"...Then time goes by where I'm relatively calm again (but it's hard to describe but deep down it's like something is brewing and I can sort of anticipate another episode coming)..then I sort of get depressed about how I got the episode earlier and it's just an endless cycle.

Get anxiety/depression...calm later on...think about how I felt just hours earlier...episode kicks in again.

This has been going on since Monday and I'm really trying to get a grip on myself but it's pretty hard since everything looks/feels the exact same way as I did last summer.

I am trying to not tell anyone I know about this because it's the exact same thing I did last summer which didn't really help to much...On the other hand I know bottling up and "self-medicating" isn't the answer either.

Instead of going to the doctors or something I thought I'd ask here to see if/how some of you guys are going through this or have dealt with it.

As of right now, I'm feeling calm but feel something brewing..don't know what to do.

Again, sorry for the long post, look forward to reading some replies:cheers:
 
The funny thing is, the EXACT same thing has been happening to me this summer. I can relate because I have no idea where it came from, but it happened a couple of weeks after school started. I feel fine during the day, but when it progresses to night, it just feels like everythings different and everything's changed and I get hit with anxiety. It's mostly based on change to me.

And AKIRA, it's a good thing that you've been through this before because you know that you won't make any stupid mistakes because you're prepared. Don't worry about breaking up with your GF, just talk to her about it and I'm sure that she'll understand.
 
Nomad said:
The funny thing is, the EXACT same thing has been happening to me this summer. I can relate because I have no idea where it came from, but it happened a couple of weeks after school started. I feel fine during the day, but when it progresses to night, it just feels like everythings different and everything's changed and I get hit with anxiety. It's mostly based on change to me.

And AKIRA, it's a good thing that you've been through this before because you know that you won't make any stupid mistakes because you're prepared. Don't worry about breaking up with your GF, just talk to her about it and I'm sure that she'll understand.
Click to expand...

Thank God you replied..basically man I think that's the problem. It's this sudden "change" in perspective which causes you to panic a bit..then from the panic you get depressed that you panicked then it just keeps repeating yourself and your mind starts to create other reasons as to why you're panicking..

Last year I think I partly blamed my GF (which is why I broke up with her)..she's a VERY emotional person so I'm reluctant to talk to her about it because I did that last summer and things got really awkward between us because she kept on trying to help but it wasn't helping and I got depressed/anxious about what I was putting her through.

I think it's just bad memories because literally a week ago monday I was absolutely FINE.

The thing you said about not making the same mistakes...well that's hit/miss because while I'm trying not to follow the same steps I made last year, it's pretty difficult to keep everything bottled inside.

I've always been a firm believer that everything you feel comes from your mind. Over the last year I've been trying to conquer that and on several occasions it has worked. There has been many depressing/anxiety inducing moments (aka midterms/exams...work/no money) yet I've been able to over come them simply by changing the way I think and it has always worked.

I've followed the same protocol but this time the depression/anxiety got a lot stronger and I think a big reason for that is due to the fact that it started the same date a year ago.

I need to figure out a way not to crack..I can't imagine putting my GF through the same shit that I put her through last year...it'd be MUCH worse this time around because I've gotten a lot closer with her/met her family and she's been nothing but great to me...

As I wrote that, the depression is kicking in soon followed by the anxiety..it's this constant cycle about feeling bad about myself/others that are around me that creates the majority of this feeling.

Sorry if I repeated myself a million times there lol, was on a roll.
 
I'm not going to read all these words and stuff right now - no time! However, I would recommend my cure-all elixir: BEER

I'm feeling calm but feel something brewing..don't know what to do.
Click to expand...

EDIT: Drink your troubles away~
 
VirusType2 said:
I'm not going to read all these words and stuff right now - no time! However, I would recommend my cure-all elixir: BEER



EDIT: Drink your troubles away~
Click to expand...

Haha, maybe I should go for a few drinks...I've never been one to rely on getting drunk to solve my problem's anyway but I do enjoy to get drunk once in a while.:thumbs:

I'm feeling pretty good right now actually, trying to not think about the depression/anxiety cycle..seems to be going ok but need to figure out how to eliminate it completely.

Do these things just fade away in time?

I'm actually going to Sweden/Germany with my Father in late August for a week..I'm really hoping it goes away by then..if not I'm really hoping the trip will help clear my mind.
 
I had a panic attack the other week after staying pretty drunk and cracked out and eating only 3 meals in a 4 day span of time, after working each day and sleeping only 4 or 5 hours at night. On the fourth day, I drank and got hella stoned, almost passed out face first into my friends car, and then when I got home I started getting retardedly delusional. Like, I started thinking that my friends were setting me up to jump me earlier in the night, and that everybody I had ever known was convinced I was a total psychopath, but was just too nice to tell me. I even started thinking that as soon as I got to work the next day, i'd loose my job and get arrested.

The day after that was pretty bad too. I went into work on my day off, and it felt like everybody around me was talking about me. I rode my bike to a friends house and the entire ride there it was as if all the passing cars would turn and stare at me.

I guess i'm not being really helpful, but I think people's brains just go to shit during the summer. A lot of people I know seem to be feeling out of it, and acting pretty psycho since school got out and they've had nothing to do.

Might need to eat, drink, and sleep more too. Maybe. Idk.
 
sinkoman said:
I had a panic attack the other week after staying pretty drunk and cracked out and eating only 3 meals in a 4 day span of time, after working each day and sleeping only 4 or 5 hours at night. On the fourth day, I drank and got hella stoned, almost passed out face first into my friends car, and then when I got home I started getting retardedly delusional. Like, I started thinking that my friends were setting me up to jump me earlier in the night, and that everybody I had ever known was convinced I was a total psychopath, but was just too nice to tell me. I even started thinking that as soon as I got to work the next day, i'd loose my job and get arrested.

The day after that was pretty bad too. I went into work on my day off, and it felt like everybody around me was talking about me. I rode my bike to a friends house and the entire ride there it was as if all the passing cars would turn and stare at me.

I guess i'm not being really helpful, but I think people's brains just go to shit during the summer. A lot of people I know seem to be feeling out of it, and acting pretty psycho since school got out and they've had nothing to do.

Might need to eat, drink, and sleep more too. Maybe. Idk.
Click to expand...

I get like that alot when I smoke too much weed, but this stuff happens when I'm sober which is worrying me especially since I'm reliving it.

I just hate how I'm normal now, but when I wake up tmw morning or something the whole cycle will happen again and I don't know what to do about it.
 
Sleep deprivation can wreak havoc on your mood - it's a fact. Sometimes I'm severely depressed when I stay up late, and it's not like anything caused it - nothing that wasn't already shitty in my life earlier in the day. After a nights sleep, I feel good again.

kinda contradicts what you are reporting though. Get some exercise after breakfast. Shit will make you feel like a million dollars.
 
VirusType2 said:
Sleep deprivation can wreak havoc on your mood - it's a fact. Sometimes I'm severely depressed when I stay up late, and it's not like anything caused it - nothing that wasn't already shitty in my life earlier in the day. After a nights sleep, I feel good again.

kinda contradicts what you are reporting though. Get some exercise after breakfast. Shit will make you feel like a million dollars.
Click to expand...

I duno, this is all emotionally draining..even if I get hours of sleep I still feel like crap in the morning. It's the fact that I remember how depressed/anxious I was the day before which makes me feel like shit then the anticipation of that feeling is keeping me on edge.
 
This happens to me every summer too. Don't worry. The days are longer, you have more time on your hands, your mind finds ways to distract itself. It's ok to be anxious every now and then. Don't worry about eliminating it or escaping it. It's more normal than you would think.
 
if I got a dollar for every time I got depresed.....
 
<RJMC> said:
if I got a dollar for every time I got depresed.....
Click to expand...

I'd be earning 24/7

I also get down a LOT. Probably for a different reason though. I can be happy as larry, but when it comes to going out i get down, for some reason the thought of going out to social stuff gets me really anxious and I'd rather just stay home, but I don't want to lose my mates either so I go along with it.

But that's just one of my million issues.
 
Depression and anxiety happens to everyone, I guess.

But recently, I've been having anxiety about sleep paralysis. I've never had it, (and it's stupid I know) but I've been scared shitless of it happening to me. So far it hasn't, but you never know...
 
Yeah depression can really get to us sometimes. You got to look at the reasons why you're having those episodes though. Once you figure them out, you work on them to improve your mental health. It sounds like to me you might be bi-polar, meaning you feel great and really bad at certain periods.

The only advice I can give is you got to distract yourself. Try not to dwell on yourself to much, it really isn't healthy. But as far as you being afraid that you'll hurt your gf again, you got to tell her about these things. Let her know what your going through personally and she should understand.

Hope that helps in someway.
 
PoeticRocker said:
Yeah depression can really get to us sometimes. You got to look at the reasons why you're having those episodes though. Once you figure them out, you work on them to improve your mental health. It sounds like to me you might be bi-polar, meaning you feel great and really bad at certain periods.

The only advice I can give is you got to distract yourself. Try not to dwell on yourself to much, it really isn't healthy. But as far as you being afraid that you'll hurt your gf again, you got to tell her about these things. Let her know what your going through personally and she should understand.

Hope that helps in someway.
Click to expand...

I have thought about being bi-polar..but It's only during times like these which has only happened twice..last summer and this summer. I'm really trying not to focus on it but it just seems like I do so well and then a few hours later, when I'm not even thinking about it, something just triggers it and it hits me like a bag of bricks.

Since I've started this thread..I've been pretty stable..I only hope it lasts and with time it'll go away. I keep telling myself I can't be depressed forever and if this is the worst it's going to hit me then I can overcome it in time.
 
I've been pretty off this whole past week too. Really exhausted every day, like the skin around my eyes is about to shrivel up and fall off or something. On Tuesday night my left eyelid puffed up like crazy for no apparent reason. I kinda think it was from staying up late Saturday night reading and sleeping most of Sunday, but it seems like I should be out of it by now.

I agree with the people who say to distract yourself. Maybe learning some kind of craft to make with your hands would help. It would at least give you something productive to focus on. Or learn how to cook, and then eat your troubles away :p. Probably depends if you like making stuff or not though -- some people get frustrated with that kind of stuff.
 
My advice would be to just calm down and don't worry, but then again I can't really relate to any of these problems.

In my life view, a problem is something that is internal to yourself. You don't know which choice to make, or have some inner conflict. This is different from a bad situation, which is external to you and you just have to accept. The solution to problems is invariably to just be happy with things the way they are or however they turn out. If you can't accept who you are and the situation you are in, then you will remain in conflict with yourself until you do, and thus still have a problem. So in other words, stop being anxious, but that's just me.
 
Dan said:
My advice would be to just calm down and don't worry, but then again I can't really relate to any of these problems.

In my life view, a problem is something that is internal to yourself. You don't know which choice to make, or have some inner conflict. This is different from a bad situation, which is external to you and you just have to accept. The solution to problems is invariably to just be happy with things the way they are or however they turn out. If you can't accept who you are and the situation you are in, then you will remain in conflict with yourself until you do, and thus still have a problem. So in other words, stop being anxious, but that's just me.
Click to expand...

I seriously agree with you and that has been my approach for the last year..It's just that I was an emotional wreck at this exact same time last year so I'm thinking this is just bad memories creeping in. It's up to me to change the way my mind thinks about it and overcome it..it's proving to be difficult though.
 
I get down in the dumps a bit, like this past week was killer on me. 2 of my best friends are in and out of the hospital for life threatening stuff and I can't visit them because I'm covering for one at work and the other is 1500 miles away. My little niece just got Lyme's Disease this past week, my dad has been arguing with me non stop, my car needs to be fixed and on top of that I'm having the usual breathing troubles and headaches with dizzyness and vertigo which doesn't help at work because the AC is turned either down or off at times to save money.

The good news is that I will be going out all day tomorrow to 2 separate shindigs, 1st one is with my family, the other is out clubbing. drinking with family and friends is how I like to cope when games can only help for so much. StarCraft is fun but real interaction with people....thats a cure in itself.
 
Nomad said:
Depression and anxiety happens to everyone, I guess.

But recently, I've been having anxiety about sleep paralysis. I've never had it, (and it's stupid I know) but I've been scared shitless of it happening to me. So far it hasn't, but you never know...
Click to expand...

I got it the other night after trying for a while, don't think I'll try it again...
 
Hey. I don't really have any advice to give, because I haven't found myself in that situation before. I don't have a whole lot of experience dealing with anxiety, at least the readily apparent kind. I have had situations where I have the complete inability to gain a deep breath, where I yawn literally every 10 seconds of every day trying to suck in air. Wasn't sure what that was all about, but apparently it's due to anxiety from what I've read. Don't have that situation at home, but when I was at my latest job it would hit me every single day all day long. I didn't feel anxious or anything, but I guess it was just something underlying.
 
Raziaar said:
Hey. I don't really have any advice to give, because I haven't found myself in that situation before. I don't have a whole lot of experience dealing with anxiety, at least the readily apparent kind. I have had situations where I have the complete inability to gain a deep breath, where I yawn literally every 10 seconds of every day trying to suck in air. Wasn't sure what that was all about, but apparently it's due to anxiety from what I've read. Don't have that situation at home, but when I was at my latest job it would hit me every single day all day long. I didn't feel anxious or anything, but I guess it was just something underlying.
Click to expand...

could be shortness of breath or some kinda breathing issues. I only get that during the summer months. the first time I had them was the worst though. I swear I was inches away from death when I woke up, rolled out of bed and started hyperventilating and no air was hitting my lungs. I told myself "CALM THE **** DOWN!" and was so pale I looked like a ghost. I probably should exercise more but I think its because I'm either not eating right or a specific food allergy is doing it to me.
 
Warped said:
could be shortness of breath or some kinda breathing issues. I only get that during the summer months. the first time I had them was the worst though. I swear I was inches away from death when I woke up, rolled out of bed and started hyperventilating and no air was hitting my lungs. I told myself "CALM THE **** DOWN!" and was so pale I looked like a ghost. I probably should exercise more but I think its because I'm either not eating right or a specific food allergy is doing it to me.
Click to expand...

Well for the past two months it's only affected me on the thursdays and fridays that I was working. It was a desk job, so I was at a computer like I am just at home, but for the entire day it would affect me, so I figure it had something to do with hidden anxiety. From everything I've read, constant yawning and inability to get deep breaths tends to be an anxiety issue. It's just weird though, because as I said I didn't feel anxious.

I would be very concerned about your sleeping thing. Waking up, unable to breathe like that. Maybe have somebody watch you as you sleep, or record yourself as you sleep? You might have sleep apnea.

I've been having some sleeping issues the past couple of days. It's weird. I'd set an alarm, far enough away that I have to get up to turn it off, which I seem to do. But I get back in bed, and fall asleep... and stay asleep. I can't wake myself up, it feels like no matter how much I try, something is preventing me from waking up. In my partial awake-asleep state, my mind is racing, that I've somehow been drugged, and that's why I can't wake up. Heh. Not sure what that's about, but it happens to me every once in a while... feeling like no matter what I try I cannot wake myself up... and what was originally planned to be a 2 hour nap, turns into a 15 hour sleep marathon.

I'm actually supposed to be going back to bed so I can wake up and play Arma 2 later today with Vegeta and Viperidae, but I'm afraid I'm going to slip into another deep sleep. Because some days I can sleep for like 15 hours... wake up for three or four hours, and then fall asleep again for another 15 hours.
 
Raziaar said:
I've been having some sleeping issues the past couple of days. It's weird. I'd set an alarm, far enough away that I have to get up to turn it off, which I seem to do. But I get back in bed, and fall asleep... and stay asleep. I can't wake myself up, it feels like no matter how much I try, something is preventing me from waking up. In my partial awake-asleep state, my mind is racing, that I've somehow been drugged, and that's why I can't wake up. Heh. Not sure what that's about, but it happens to me every once in a while... feeling like no matter what I try I cannot wake myself up... and what was originally planned to be a 2 hour nap, turns into a 15 hour sleep marathon.
Click to expand...

Seems like your 'internal clock' might not be functioning correctly. It's probably some minor sleeping disorder caused by stress that can be fixed, but I'm not going to assume anything personal and whatnot. Sometimes I'll wake up in the middle of the night just randomly, and I'll try to go back to sleep, but it's hard. Takes me around ten minutes to, and then if I'm really unlucky that night, I'll wake up yet again, and by that point, I'm probably giving up and going downstairs to start my day while it's like, oh, I don't know, 4:30 A.M. or something. This only happens once in a while, thankfully, but when it does, it's somewhat annoying.
 
Nomad said:
You mean you triggered it? Holy shit, what were you trying to do?
Click to expand...

I was using it in attempt to lucid dream, but I had audio hallucinations which scared the hell out of me.
 
Shem said:
Seems like your 'internal clock' might not be functioning correctly. It's probably some minor sleeping disorder caused by stress that can be fixed, but I'm not going to assume anything personal and whatnot. Sometimes I'll wake up in the middle of the night just randomly, and I'll try to go back to sleep, but it's hard. Takes me around ten minutes to, and then if I'm really unlucky that night, I'll wake up yet again, and by that point, I'm probably giving up and going downstairs to start my day while it's like, oh, I don't know, 4:30 A.M. or something. This only happens once in a while, thankfully, but when it does, it's somewhat annoying.
Click to expand...

caffeine can do that to you. for most people it stays in your system for like 10-14 hrs
 
GAH..thought I had it beat yesterday but today it came back with a vengence :( I really really hate this. My technique of talking myself out of this weird feeling isn't being too effective.

Other things have contributed to this I think just at the wrong time. My muffler on my car is hanging and looks like it's about to fall off (all the garages are closed today)...my work didn't pay me for some reason so I have to call them tomorrow and get that straightened out (I have no money in my account now) and I got into a fight with my gf...Things just aren't going my way and I'm really struggling to stay on top of things.

Thanks for the replies so far.
 
AKIRA said:
GAH..thought I had it beat yesterday but today it came back with a vengence :( I really really hate this. My technique of talking myself out of this weird feeling isn't being too effective.

Other things have contributed to this I think just at the wrong time. My muffler on my car is hanging and looks like it's about to fall off (all the garages are closed today)...my work didn't pay me for some reason so I have to call them tomorrow and get that straightened out (I have no money in my account now) and I got into a fight with my gf...Things just aren't going my way and I'm really struggling to stay on top of things.

Thanks for the replies so far.
Click to expand...

At least they're real life problems that are causing your anxiety. You can always overcome problems like those.
 
How did some of you guys get over your depression/anxiety? Is there anything specific that you did to alleviate or eliminate it or did it pass with time?
 
It may not be much, but music is awesome. Songs that seem to describe exactly how I feel tend to help more then anything.
 
Exercise helps a lot! When I go for a jog, I come back refreshed. Swimming too because not only does it work all the bones in your body but it makes you feel like a kid again. Variety is nice too. if you continually wake up at the same time every morning or take the same way home everyday from work you'll become monotonous. I like to switch things up a lot
 
A lot of it is a mindset. Once you can figure out how to get a better mind set things work out a little better. Once you finally give into the fact that worrying does nothing.

It ain't always easy, and you might become a little disconnected initially, but it's worth putting in the effort.
 
FrostedxB said:
It may not be much, but music is awesome. Songs that seem to describe exactly how I feel tend to help more then anything.
Click to expand...

That actually is working for me so far. I never thought that music would help so much!:D
 
AKIRA said:
How did some of you guys get over your depression/anxiety? Is there anything specific that you did to alleviate or eliminate it or did it pass with time?
Click to expand...
I have bipolar, and can get really depressed sometimes. Therefore, I suppose I have become an expert on feeling better.

food. Every food can affect your mood differently. Obviously, sugary foods like fruit can give you energy, and certain foods probably make you feel like shit.
Money. See if you can't suffer through and try to earn as much money as you can as fast as possible for a while and see what happens. (try for overtime or whatever the ****, just work and go home and right to bed for a few days and then PAYDAY) -EDIT: personally, I find that if I'm miserable, I might as well be getting paid during it, so I'll work more hours. I tend to work harder when I feel low, and then - I feel awesome; a sense of accomplishment. It's rewarding when the day is done and then I can relax. food and entertainment will be much better if you've 'earned it'.

Alcoholic beverages. best before a meal
sex everyday if possible. (don't have to tell you, I'm sure)
watch comedy
omega-3 fish pills. I don't know for sure, but these might help - particularly if you don't eat much fish, obviously.
Rewarding rituals
chocolate - for example, one good bite after dinner 'every' night would be on two levels: 1) chocolate makes you feel good 2) ritual behavior - something rewarding to look forward to.
vitamins - well I don't know. At least Vitamin D
at least 15 minutes of sun twice a week
get your heart rate up for at least 30 minutes a day - especially some exercise that gets your lungs and circulation going - like jogging.
plenty of sleep, especially if it's going to bed at the same time every night, even on weekends.
don't spend too much time on the internet. Get in and get out, like a bank robber. **** around too long and you get trapped.
Tea, coffee or hot chocolate
don't smoke or drink soda

Take a break from what you are doing once in a while. I swear it's just the way the mind works, it gets bored easily. Your brain will reward you if you change the scenery once in a while and come back to things, instead of working on the same thing for a long time, you hit a dead end - like 'writers block'.

being on a schedule helps to maintain order. If everyday you go for a jog, take a shower and then do the dishes while you make dinner.. this kind of schedule will give you peace of mind. Non-chaotic. It's like because you don't have to worry or think about it, and you feel like things are unfolding as they should.

probably forgot some. Really, just be like: **** it, I'm just going to not give a shit. I'm going to make the best of what life throws me. If you are in jail, are you going to play cards and bullshit with people, or just spend your time wishing you were out, making yourself crazy? Well, life is sort of like a prison sentence, so make the best of it and it will be a hell of a lot more rewarding.
 
I COMPLETELY ****ING FORGOT.

Potassium works against nervousness and anxieties. Eating bananas or foods enriched with potassium should do the trick.
 
Ok, so I seem to have been going into phases where I get really anxious for a few minutes then calm down..I seem to have narrowed it down to when I'm calm - I'm calm but in the back of my head my mind is anticipating another episode which seems to always come BECAUSE i'm anticipating it.

It's the anticipation that I'm trying to control. Sorry if I keep bringing this thread up, just helps a bit when I get my feelings out here/know someone is reading it and can possibly help.

Just a question before I end this post lol:

Is it common to "relapse" on this depression/anxiety thing just because it happened the same time a year ago? As I mentioned in earlier posts, I had the exact same symptoms for a couple of months last year starting july 26th and ended september 27...I've been sort of anticipating the date as july came to a close and when it came it hit me and I'll hate myself for constantly reminding me of the past but it's just something that's very hard to control.

Anyway, thanks to all for reading :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Krynn72
You guys, what the **** is up.
Replies
11
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
HL2.NET HORROR SLAP
Replies
7
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
Vaapukka
New years etc.
Replies
2
Views
997
Shem
Shem
Tollbooth Willie
thanks guys
Replies
1
Views
1K
Shem
Shem
TechnoHippyChic
Forum Artifact Preservation Project
2
Replies
63
Views
7K
Raziaar
Raziaar
Back
Top