ya Portal 2 sucks

Holy crap. Toaster still posts?

edit: next thing ya know, Munro will start posting....
 
It's so easy to get you guys fired up. BTW I'm not using length as a sole indicator, and I don't think anyone is, but I'm sorry if after 2 years I'm disappointed in the fact they came up with 6 hours of mediocre gameplay and puzzles that unfortunately weren't even close to challenging. I had more fun reading and following the hype leading up to the games release than the game itself.
 
Got through SP today and doing coop. Man this game is ****ing great. I'm really satisfied.
 
It's so easy to get you guys fired up. BTW I'm not using length as a sole indicator, and I don't think anyone is, but I'm sorry if after 2 years I'm disappointed in the fact they came up with 6 hours of mediocre gameplay and puzzles that unfortunately weren't even close to challenging. I had more fun reading and following the hype leading up to the games release than the game itself.

Don't let the neckbeards twist your opinion, Portal 2 is contrived, boring, and just plain bad. I'm saying this with no experience playing it - shit sucks.
 
I had more fun reading and following the hype leading up to the games release than the game itself.
"More fun reading and following hype" than you had playing Portal 2 only reflects on your idea of fun. Some guys' idea of fun is to have their dick stamped on by ladies in high heels, but y'know, so what.
 
I love how much perspective contributes to the "objective opinion" of so many individuals. People get sucked in to hype and have these expectations that are crazy. If this game was 45 hours of pure perfection there would be thousands of people saying the same stuff. It's crazy really... the way things like this work... but think of it this way - If Portal 2 came out in place of Portal 1, it would have been received with even higher reviews with people creaming their pants with elation. The price point is the same as just about any other game released these days. Considering the fact that every facet of level design has to be considered in order to make the maps both functional, challenging, and engaging while still being intuitive, I couldn't imagine the SP being longer than 6 or so hours unless you wanted a five year development time. Like I said it's just a matter of perception and hype.
 
VALVE WAS FINE BEFORE THIS, THEY MADE A LOT OF MONEY, THEY HAVE STEAM IN FACT AND GET SO MUCH INCOME FROM THAT THEY COULD HAVE PROBABLY RELEASED PORTAL 2 FREE WITH NO DEFICIT

Do you remotely have any idea as to the monthly overheads of a 200 + person company? It's no secret Valve almost went to the wall when HL2 got delayed (thus why they whored out ATi graphics cards for a cool $5 million to tide them over). This idea that Gabe sits on a big pile of cash and they exist in a space without a financial care in the world is a fiction. Sure Steam's been good for them, but you have to bear in mind albeit it makes money for them, they are the ones paying for the overheads. What Steam provides Valve with is a degree of security in terms of income, enough to allow them to retain their publisher independence, but I doubt it's making them world of warcraft money.
 
Do you remotely have any idea as to the monthly overheads of a 200 + person company? It's no secret Valve almost went to the wall when HL2 got delayed (thus why they whored out ATi graphics cards for a cool $5 million to tide them over). This idea that Gabe sits on a big pile of cash and they exist in a space without a financial care in the world is a fiction. Sure Steam's been good for them, but you have to bear in mind albeit it makes money for them, they are the ones paying for the overheads. What Steam provides Valve with is a degree of security in terms of income, enough to allow them to retain their publisher independence, but I doubt it's making them world of warcraft money.

Watch this, specifically the part starting at 19:20. He says "the financials of our businessmen are great, they're sort of ridiculous." He doesn't even worry about the financials anymore.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOMI0BxB0yA
 
A full version is so not even enough. I need an entire album of this shit. Some of you might have contentions over what you feel is gratuitous verb choice there but you are wrong, you are so wrong, I need this music in my life oh my god what do I even do

This is a great idea. We should get enough people to beg Gabe to tell the boys in the Valve Music Class to put out an entire Portal Opera Vinyl Record on the Valve store.
 
Halfway through Portal 2, it hit me - this was the first full length Valve epic I'd played since HL2. That's right - full length. It's a journey as full of quality and content as HL or HL2, and the only reason I wasn't fully satisfied was because I needed more. So I started the co op.

TLDR; Valve is holding all the cards, and guess what?
They're all full houses.
 
Do you remotely have any idea as to the monthly overheads of a 200 + person company? It's no secret Valve almost went to the wall when HL2 got delayed (thus why they whored out ATi graphics cards for a cool $5 million to tide them over). This idea that Gabe sits on a big pile of cash and they exist in a space without a financial care in the world is a fiction. Sure Steam's been good for them, but you have to bear in mind albeit it makes money for them, they are the ones paying for the overheads. What Steam provides Valve with is a degree of security in terms of income, enough to allow them to retain their publisher independence, but I doubt it's making them world of warcraft money.

Not so. Valve is LOADED.

Their revenue is in the billions with Steam. I read an article recently that Valve makes more money per employee than Google.
 
This is seriously the dumbest thing said in this thread.

Yeah? Well, you know ... that's just, like, uh, your opinion, man. I could imagine getting sick of a sucky partner. To side with you, though, it hardly seems like a valid complaint of the game itself.
 
The other is digital, and probably one animator doing it in a few hours(I don't really pretend to know about skinning and stuff but from the amount of community members who do it, it can't be terribly difficult).

Except you are pretending. And you are assuming. If you don't know anything about it - and you evidently don't - sit down and be quiet.
 
Not so. Valve is LOADED.

Their revenue is in the billions with Steam. I read an article recently that Valve makes more money per employee than Google.

A couple of things:
- Revenue isn't the same as profit
- Valve making more profit per employee than Google isn't that strange, because they employ a lot less people (260 vs. 26.000 employees). Plus Google runs a relatively low profit; their earnings-per-share are 27.28 and that isn't exactly stellar.
- The goal of a company is to make profit. Especially in the gaming industry this is important because you have to invest a lot of money in future projects before you can make any cash.
- Releasing a first person puzzler is still considered taking a financial risk. Sure, sales to fans of the series will probably make up a big part of the production costs, but after that Valve still needs to make a profit.
- The high level of polish in Valve games comes at a price. I bet Portal 2 was in a releasable state last December, but Valve still decided to delay so they could spend four more months on the game. That is four extra months of overhead for 260 people.
 
- The high level of polish in Valve games comes at a price. I bet Portal 2 was in a releasable state last December, but Valve still decided to delay so they could spend four more months on the game. That is four extra months of overhead for 260 people.

Only if their entire staff was working on the game exclusively for those months. Which isn't how Valve work...
 
Only if their entire staff was working on the game exclusively for those months. Which isn't how Valve work...

Right, so 150 people then. That is still a shit load of money. 4*150*$4.000=$2.400.000
 
So got a hold of this via mooching off a friend(aha!) and I just don't get it. It's certainly not as short as some of these reviews say, but I think that might be a bad thing, because I'm really getting sick of this facility romping and lack of good puzzles. Dunno how anyone had trouble with these, though I have yet to get to the later parts of the game. A lot of these jokes are nice, I guess, Wheatley in particular for a time, but it just doesn't FEEL like Portal, it feels more like a point and click adventure game with exposition which varies from funny to bad.

I'm not calling it bad, it's certainly a fairly good game for I guess what was expected, but it feels like it's dragging on without any substance, especially after the
escape scene etc
Hopefully once I get some sleep and tackle the endgame it'll get better?

So far the most fun I've had was
sitting there listening to Wheatley try and hack the neurotoxin computer.

Maybe I'm just all portaled out? Idunno.
 
Watch this, specifically the part starting at 19:20. He says "the financials of our businessmen are great, they're sort of ridiculous." He doesn't even worry about the financials anymore.

Listen to the commentary in Portal 2 where they talk about how they didn't go down a particular route with the story because it would of been too expensive to get in another voice actor and then come back to me.

Their revenue is in the billions with Steam. I read an article recently that Valve makes more money per employee than Google.

Firstly what shaker said. Secondly, care to point to said article?
 
However, Steam being worth billions and Steam having revenue in billions are of course two different things.

Exactly. Them labelling Gabe as a billionaire is slightly disingenuous as well given that it's really a case of him possessing a majority share hold in the firm and the firm possessing a certain quantitive value at this point in time (if they were ever to sell it). Gabe probably has a nice bank balance based on his slice of the internal profit share, and probably would feature in a few top earning games industry luminaries rich lists, but small potatoes Vs the Steve Jobs of this world.
 
Listen to the commentary in Portal 2 where they talk about how they didn't go down a particular route with the story because it would of been too expensive to get in another voice actor and then come back to me.

Being loaded doesn't mean you stop setting budget limits for your projects.
 
Speaking of Gabe, dunno how old this is but it is awesome none the less.

rp25r.jpg
 
It probably didn't help that you hadn't even played half of one of the two parts of the game when you wrote that. It does sound to me like you're just trying to justify your own negative opinion of Valve in general, but it's hard to do that with Portal 2. It certainly isn't perfect. Some parts seem a little bit forced and heavy handed, while other parts seem somewhat too quiet and neglected, but they're far and few between and it's easily one of the best games I've ever played.
 
But combining those classical melodies with warm electronic music that sounds like dappled sunlight shining through a canopy of trees would if it were an aural phenomenon rather than a visual one? Oh, oh, oh wow

By the way, it's been translated into English. Major revelation if accurate..-

Dear beautiful, my beautiful darling
My child, oh Chell [pun: "oh heavens!"]
For I hold her in esteem.
For I hold her in esteem.
Farewell to my dear
My dear girl,
why do you not walk away?
Yes, away from Science,
My dear, my dear girl?
Ah, my beautiful!
Ah, my dear!
Ah, my dear!
Ah, my child!
Oh dear, my dear...

or

Dear, beautiful, my dear, beautiful little girl, oh Chell, what a pity, what a pity, well! My dear, Goodbye.
My little girl, dear, why don’t you stay far, so far, away from science?
Dear, dear little girl, ah my beautiful, ah my dear, my dear, my little girl, my dear, my dear…

I know that could be interpreted in a few different ways, but I definitely think Valve is teasing at the idea of

Glados maybe being your stepmom
 
I don't see any revelation. Glados is fonder of Chell than she ever let on?
 
GLaDOS might just be an emotionally unstable crazy-person? But then again, so are most women!

Oh snap!
 
I don't see any revelation. Glados is fonder of Chell than she ever let on?

It depends if it's translated as child or girl. Either way, the most minute details are taken into consideration when creating a game, especially one by Valve. Phrases like "My little girl" weren't just thrown into the song haphazardly; the writers knew Valve Fans have theories about everyone and everything in their game universe, and they knew those fanatics would dig for suggestive answers anywhere.

So without a doubt the writers intentionally added lyrics that suggest Glados as a maternal figure in order to tease us about the possibility. Does this mean GLados is Chell's step mom? No. Did they intentionally put suggestive lyrics in there anyways? Probably hell yes.
 
glados = caroline
caroline means freeman
freeman is gman
gman and alyx get married and have a child, chell.
chell goes back in time (using borealis) to stop the resonance cascade in portal 3
she gets married with eli, and changes her name to azian
they have a child, alyx
 
glados = caroline
caroline means freeman
freeman is gman
gman and alyx get married and have a child, chell.
chell goes back in time (using borealis) to stop the resonance cascade in portal 3
she gets married with eli, and changes her name to azian
they have a child, alyx

So Chell is her own grandmother? As in the daughter of her child?
 
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