Help with a girl

[Shift]

Jesus christ count your blessings, at least you have found a girl you like. I have been through 6 years of primary school, 5 years of secondary school, 2 years of college and now almost through first year of uni, and the only girl I have known who I have liked was way back in the final year of primary school, the time when I acted like a complete nutcase around her and she obviously thought I was complete wierdo.

Other than that, there hasn't been a single girl I have actually had feelings for beyond, 'wow she is hot', except for fictional characters played by actresses or whatever in films. I have been in an emotional state since getting to uni, not because I think girls dont like me, because I am pretty certain I have been well fancied, and girls have tried hitting on me a few times, but I just never been interested.

The mere fact that the different, interesting girls that I get really attracted too are usually always fictional just strengthens the fact that they are going more and more out of existance, I walk around uni everyday and see girls, and I can just look at them and tell they are boring.

I mean maybe im being too picky but hell, when I find a girl, I want a nice, smart, interesting and hot girl who can chat to about anything, where it doesn't matter how crap my day has been, I can see her and my day just becomes amazing again. I mean is that so hard to find?

Im 19 years old, and I haven't even ****ing kissed a girl yet, nevermind had a ****ing girlfriend, and my mates and my sister think thats its crazy that someone like me is in that situation, about 5 times I have had to ask girls out for my mates because they were too scared too. Just no one understands at all, my mum even PROPERLY accused me of being gay over the summer, ended up telling her to **** off.

So I dont mean to sound harsh because hasn't been the best mood for a while (and I blame uni mostly), but quit complaining about how you cant talk to a girl to ask her out, at least you have found someone you like.

 

[Darkside55]

The roses idea isn't too bad as long as it's anonymous. She could get freaked out but hopefully since she is single it will make her think she has a secret admirer and then be on the look out.

On the lookout for the next person who asks her out, which will trigger her "creepy, possible stalker" alarm. The roses are altogether a bad idea.

after that you could joke around about doing something after...something stupid like robbing a bank

There is no picture in my considerably-large "Expressions: -_-" folder that would even begin to apply here. Glirk, man...do you...do you hear yourself before you speak?

Hey, Plugsuit, stop listening immediately. Nothing like that will work.

 

[Deleted member 56031]

Actually shift my story ain't too different from yours my dad actually thinks I'm gay cos I have never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl.

 

[ríomhaire]

Do you bring your favourite Transformer along to show her?

Ohshiohshiohshi!
Do I bring Starscream, Wreck-gar or Omega Supreme? If I bring Starscream on a first date I might seem over-eager. If I bring Omega Supreme, well, he's just damn intimidating and Wreck-gar always has that strange smell lingering over him.

 

[Darkside55]

Whatever you do, don't bring Ultra Magnus! That tells a girl you can't deal with her right now.

Personally out of all of those...my mind's telling me to tell you to bring Starscream. My gut says go with Wreck-Gar. Nothing says dependable like a guy who resists fire, rain and corrosion for up to five years guaranteed or your money back.

 

[Glirk Dient]

On the lookout for the next person who asks her out, which will trigger her "creepy, possible stalker" alarm. The roses are altogether a bad idea.

Not necessarily...back in school on valentines day girls would get lots of secret admirer roses and it made a lot of them go nuts. However most of them that got them from stalkers already knew who it was cause stalkers usually creep them out right away and don't give up.

There is no picture in my considerably-large "Expressions: -_-" folder that would even begin to apply here. Glirk, man...do you...do you hear yourself before you speak?

Witty humor goes a long ways. What would you suggest? He runs up to her tells her that he wants to marry her and have 5 kids and go on a date to the mcdonalds dollar menu? I haven't seen you give any real advice...just saying that things won't work.

Girls like guys who are different in a good way. Lot's of guys can take her to the movie or ask her out to dinner but not many guys can come up with something clever or even add it into conversation to make it sound normal. Not to mention making a joke about it is a great way to relieve the awkwardness that often follows so you don't lose your confidence. I only offered that as an example because I usually have a fairly sarcastic sense of humor.

 

[CptStern]

Jesus christ count your blessings, at least you have found a girl you like. I have been through 6 years of primary school, 5 years of secondary school, 2 years of college and now almost through first year of uni, and the only girl I have known who I have liked was way back in the final year of primary school, the time when I acted like a complete nutcase around her and she obviously thought I was complete wierdo.

Other than that, there hasn't been a single girl I have actually had feelings for beyond, 'wow she is hot', except for fictional characters played by actresses or whatever in films. I have been in an emotional state since getting to uni, not because I think girls dont like me, because I am pretty certain I have been well fancied, and girls have tried hitting on me a few times, but I just never been interested.

The mere fact that the different, interesting girls that I get really attracted too are usually always fictional just strengthens the fact that they are going more and more out of existance, I walk around uni everyday and see girls, and I can just look at them and tell they are boring.

I mean maybe im being too picky but hell, when I find a girl, I want a nice, smart, interesting and hot girl who can chat to about anything, where it doesn't matter how crap my day has been, I can see her and my day just becomes amazing again. I mean is that so hard to find?

Im 19 years old, and I haven't even ****ing kissed a girl yet, nevermind had a ****ing girlfriend, and my mates and my sister think thats its crazy that someone like me is in that situation, about 5 times I have had to ask girls out for my mates because they were too scared too. Just no one understands at all, my mum even PROPERLY accused me of being gay over the summer, ended up telling her to **** off.

So I dont mean to sound harsh because hasn't been the best mood for a while (and I blame uni mostly), but quit complaining about how you cant talk to a girl to ask her out, at least you have found someone you like.

it's a prerequisite to "like" someone before going on a date? what happened to casual dating followed by casual sex? no strings attached = win win


anyways some of you guys need to stop looking for a "girlfriend" and look for someone to date and see where it goes from there

 

[Darkside55]

Not necessarily...back in school on valentines day girls would get lots of secret admirer roses and it made a lot of them go nuts. However most of them that got them from stalkers already knew who it was cause stalkers usually creep them out right away and don't give up.

Because those girls are giggling simps. "Tee-hee a boy sent me rooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooses!"

Witty humor goes a long ways. What would you suggest? He runs up to her tells her that he wants to marry her and have 5 kids and go on a date to the mcdonalds dollar menu? I haven't seen you give any real advice...just saying that things won't work.

Man where do you keep pulling that out of, bro? "Are you trying to say he should run up and marry her?! Are you saying he should marry her?!" You sound as elementary school as some of your suggestions, dude. I haven't said anything like that at all, and in fact I advise so strongly against that that I don't know why you've repeated it twice now. Have you been posting in this thread and then been reading posts from Bizarro Darkside on Bizarro Halflife2.net? Seriously knock that shit off it makes you sound six.

And speaking of which your suggestions are ludicrous. "Ask her if she wants to knock over a bank lololol," "Invite her to a pajama party!" My God, man. You think, "Let's rob a bank?" is clever? You think that's witty? You think pajama parties are a good idea for a date? This is ridiculous; sir are you trolling me? You're the most successful f*cking troll I ever done met; you MUST be trolling me. Which is all well and good, but you're hurting the OP dude. He doesn't need this shit.

He doesn't need anonymous roses.

He doesn't need pajama parties.

He doesn't need jokes that quite frankly I can think of neither place nor period where they would be funny.

He needs a swift kick in the ass and some self-confidence to be straightforward and direct. You say I haven't given any good advice? I'm trying to give him an ego boost so he can man up.

You're giving him part of the incantation to Little Nemo in Slumberland.

 

[CptStern]

:O

I think Darkside finally blew a gasket

 

[Darkside55]

"Finally?"

Also, just because after I said it I wanted to watch it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bAvSPFQPuU

Pajama pajama!

 

[Eejit]

Jesus christ count your blessings, at least you have found a girl you like. I have been through 6 years of primary school, 5 years of secondary school, 2 years of college and now almost through first year of uni, and the only girl I have known who I have liked was way back in the final year of primary school, the time when I acted like a complete nutcase around her and she obviously thought I was complete wierdo.

Im 19 years old, and I haven't even ****ing kissed a girl yet, nevermind had a ****ing girlfriend, and my mates and my sister think thats its crazy that someone like me is in that situation, about 5 times I have had to ask girls out for my mates because they were too scared too. Just no one understands at all, my mum even PROPERLY accused me of being gay over the summer, ended up telling her to **** off.

I was in a similar situation at that stage. The right girl is out there, she's just hard to find... but worth the search.

 

[Acepilotf14]

I had this problem a while ago when I sent a candy gram near Christmas-time to this girl I liked, [NOT anonymously.] which didn't help much at all. I just got this crappy note that said 'Thanks' and I got over it.

Spoiler

I keep the note in my wallet.

 

[CptStern]

I had this problem a while ago when I sent a candy gram near Christmas-time to this girl I liked, [NOT anonymously.] which didn't help much at all. I just got this crappy note that said 'Thanks' and I got over it.

Spoiler

I keep the note in my wallet. next to her severed ear

fixed

 

[ríomhaire]

Whatever you do, don't bring Ultra Magnus! That tells a girl you can't deal with her right now.

Personally out of all of those...my mind's telling me to tell you to bring Starscream. My gut says go with Wreck-Gar. Nothing says dependable like a guy who resists fire, rain and corrosion for up to five years guaranteed or your money back.

Damn it! I need some friendly service, I'm going with Wreck-Gar. REMOVES 100% OF ALL STAINS!

 

[Darkside55]

Why you gotta take people's ears, Ace?

 

[Acepilotf14]

She really sucked at playing as a necro.

 

[Glirk Dient]

Because those girls are giggling simps. "Tee-hee a boy sent me rooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooses!"

Most girls are...and that makes them bad candidates why?

Man where do you keep pulling that out of, bro? "Are you trying to say he should run up and marry her?! Are you saying he should marry her?!" You sound as elementary school as some of your suggestions, dude. I haven't said anything like that at all, and in fact I advise so strongly against that that I don't know why you've repeated it twice now. Have you been posting in this thread and then been reading posts from Bizarro Darkside on Bizarro Halflife2.net? Seriously knock that shit off it makes you sound six.

Because you keep telling him to just go tell her how he feels. That's usually a bad idea because it makes him look creepy...has that strategy ever worked for you?

And speaking of which your suggestions are ludicrous. "Ask her if she wants to knock over a bank lololol," "Invite her to a pajama party!" My God, man. You think, "Let's rob a bank?" is clever? You think that's witty? You think pajama parties are a good idea for a date? This is ridiculous; sir are you trolling me? You're the most successful f*cking troll I ever done met; you MUST be trolling me. Which is all well and good, but you're hurting the OP dude. He doesn't need this shit.

You don't have much success do you? Humor is pretty much essential in the start of a relationship and any long term relationships. I am not saying to say exactly what I did...but add something funny in there and it will help lots. Also...I am definately sigging the troll part. I am amazing. Also...the robbing the bank thing can be added in such as "Hey wanna go to dinner?" she says "sure" and then you say "Pick any restaurant...the sky is the limit even if it's $100 for an appetizer...but we may have to go rob a bank afterwards to pay for it and I will totally let you pick between the richard nixon mask and the hello kitty one".

He needs a swift kick in the ass and some self-confidence to be straightforward and direct. You say I haven't given any good advice? I'm trying to give him an ego boost so he can man up.

He doesn't need to "man up". He needs to learn how to act around women to become more successful. Women aren't attracted to manliness. The guys who are most successful aren't body builders who own 10 guns and 4 different muscle cars. They are normal people who are funny, good looking and are smart enough to be able to pick up on all of the subtle hints so they know the right thing to say. It just takes practice.

 

[Eejit]

fixed

 

[Krynn72]

So much awesome advice in this thread. Im gunna go try it all out brb

 

[Darkside55]

Most girls are...and that makes them bad candidates why?

Because if you want anything more than a practice girl, by which I mean, "I'm going to take you out and possibly upgrade you to booty call status," you don't want those ones. Or maybe you do, hey, some people are just looking for a cumdumpster. OP sounds like he might actually want a relationship here.

Because you keep telling him to just go tell her how he feels. That's usually a bad idea because it makes him look creepy...has that strategy ever worked for you?

Again, I'm not telling him to effuse romantic musings and declarations of love. I'm telling him to stop standing in the background wondering whether or not she has feelings for him. I'm telling him to take the first proactive step and say one simple goddamned, "Hello," to initiate a conversation, feel her out (not in the physical sense just yet) and ask her out. And yeah, that has worked for me. It goes like this:

Me: "<Conversation opener>"
Her: "<Dialogue>"
Me: "Hey, would you like to grab a bite?"
Her: "Sure."

I didn't need to tell her we can go hit the town like Bonnie and Clyde, and I didn't need to tell her that my ice cream is so totally better than hers omg pajama party. It's very juvenile, mate.

You don't have much success do you? Humor is pretty much essential in the start of a relationship and any long term relationships. I am not saying to say exactly what I did...but add something funny in there and it will help lots. Also...I am definately sigging the troll part. I am amazing. Also...the robbing the bank thing can be added in such as "Hey wanna go to dinner?" she says "sure" and then you say "Pick any restaurant...the sky is the limit even if it's $100 for an appetizer...but we may have to go rob a bank afterwards to pay for it I can totally lend you a ski mask haha".

No, see, stop. Stop. What you're doing isn't humor. You are coming dangerously close to the anti-humor; son just this morning I had to tell a fairly well known webcomic author that he's anti-humorous; please don't go further with your "jokes." I don't want to have to break two hearts today.

I just. God. Is it leaking or something? Did somebody poison the waterhole or some shit? Where's the funny in the world? Where has it gone? Ski mask...appetizers...my God.

He doesn't need to "man up". He needs to learn how to act around women to become more successful. Women aren't attracted to manliness. The guys who are most successful aren't body builders who own 10 guns and 4 different muscle cars. They are normal people who are funny, good looking and are smart enough to be able to pick up on all of the subtle hints so they know the right thing to say. It just takes practice.

Women are attracted to confidence. He doesn't need muscles or cars to be a man. He needs confidence; more than learning to "handle women" like they're textbook. How the hell are you going to HANDLE a woman when you're too goddamn afraid to say hello?

Y'all are going to end up making Darkside explain what it is to be a man. Don't make me. There's a song involved. Don't make me break out the song, noobs.

 

[Eejit]

Ron, what's it like being in love?

 

[Darkside55]

You really wanna know what love is?

It's really quite simple.

It's kinda like...

Gonna find my baby gonna hold her tight,
gonna grab some afternoon delight
My motto's always been, "When it's right, it's right"
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?

Take it, Eejit!

 

[jimbo118]

Omg Darkside seriously, you ****ing own'd the last 2 pages lol...

 

[Unfocused]

Darkside's got some good advice, but Glirk's got some good stuff too IMHO. That "bank robbery" joke is not anti-humour. It's something that will make the girl go "wtf?" for a second, right before she cracks up and goes along with it.

The PJ party is weird, though I'm surprised it works for you Glirk, do new met girls really feel comfortable with spending the night at your place right away? Unless you jump in your PJs during the day and then put your clothes back on after you're finished with the ice cream

 

[theotherguy]

definatley talk about it with random people on the internet. That will help.

 

[taviow]

Seems to have helped so far.

 

[Insano]

Jesus christ count your blessings, at least you have found a girl you like. I have been through 6 years of primary school, 5 years of secondary school, 2 years of college and now almost through first year of uni, and the only girl I have known who I have liked was way back in the final year of primary school, the time when I acted like a complete nutcase around her and she obviously thought I was complete wierdo.

Other than that, there hasn't been a single girl I have actually had feelings for beyond, 'wow she is hot', except for fictional characters played by actresses or whatever in films. I have been in an emotional state since getting to uni, not because I think girls dont like me, because I am pretty certain I have been well fancied, and girls have tried hitting on me a few times, but I just never been interested.

The mere fact that the different, interesting girls that I get really attracted too are usually always fictional just strengthens the fact that they are going more and more out of existance, I walk around uni everyday and see girls, and I can just look at them and tell they are boring.

I mean maybe im being too picky but hell, when I find a girl, I want a nice, smart, interesting and hot girl who can chat to about anything, where it doesn't matter how crap my day has been, I can see her and my day just becomes amazing again. I mean is that so hard to find?

Im 19 years old, and I haven't even ****ing kissed a girl yet, nevermind had a ****ing girlfriend, and my mates and my sister think thats its crazy that someone like me is in that situation, about 5 times I have had to ask girls out for my mates because they were too scared too. Just no one understands at all, my mum even PROPERLY accused me of being gay over the summer, ended up telling her to **** off.

So I dont mean to sound harsh because hasn't been the best mood for a while (and I blame uni mostly), but quit complaining about how you cant talk to a girl to ask her out, at least you have found someone you like.

Don't worry, man. You're not alone. My advice: don't do anything stupid, take your time. I could talk hours about this stuff, but I've already done so with my mates, so can't be arsed

definatley talk about it with random people on the internet. That will help.

I made a thread on HL2.net and all I got were these lousy girls.

 

[Darkside55]

What is wrong with that girl's teeth? Eugh.

 

[Dynasty]

Wow...chinese people DO all look the same..

 

[Evo]

Wow...chinese people DO all look the same..

:shh:

 

[sinkoman]

I found myself in this situation this past break. Wanted to try something with a friend, but she was into one of my good friends

What you can do, that is, if your friend has no feelings for her, is to try to just spend more time with her.

You'll eventually hit a point where either you've managed to get enough of her attention to confidently ask her out, or where you've finally found out you have no chance in hell and just hit the eject button. But yeah, if it feels "right", just ask her. You'll know when you'll have a chance, your instincts will kick in and tell you to ****ing do it. When you get the feeling, just sack up and go for it.

If you are going to try to pull something with her, be nonchalant about it, since you two are "friends" (and by that I assume you two already talk every so often). More "Hey, what are you doing tomorrow?", less "Hey you want to go to a movie tonight, just me and you?"

But yeah, things don't look good for you. You know why? Because you don't seem too happy whilst single, and if you can't be happy alone, what makes you think you'll be happy with somebody else?

When you can be happy without women, and not care that they exist, that's when they'll start coming to you.

 

[Avoidist]

You know, every time you hit the eject button, a helicopter crashes.

 

[hool10]

Yeah I feel Shifts pain too (except for the perfect thing, idk about that lol). Another Valentines day fapping away to Pitz. People call me the Poon Hunter too at college. I never get lucky neither. It's either:

1. Girls hate me. For some reason people joke that I'm some type of freak or they just hate me. People introduce me and I'm like "hi" and they just look at me and give me this face of: :|hi...:| Must be the East Coast idk.
2. All the girls that I want to go out with are actually 16 and they say it the first class. So that ends that.
3. They are married.
4. Married with kids even.
5. Have a boyfriend.
6. Ugly, inbred NH thing.
7. Foreign country and she speaks completely Russian.

I'm going to a community college and after 2 years, I thought it would look like something out of MTV. Instead I'm still typing at this keyboard, now 20 and counting.

 

[sinkoman]

Btw...

 

[ericms]

Suck it up and move on. There isnt anything you can do if she doesnt have feelings for you.

That's what you think. AND I'M OUUUUUUUTTT.

 

[TechnoHippyChic]

I'M OUUUUUUUTTT.

That's what he said.

 

[bbson john]

How can someone put down a girl's warning flag against him?

 

[Glirk Dient]

Because if you want anything more than a practice girl, by which I mean, "I'm going to take you out and possibly upgrade you to booty call status," you don't want those ones. Or maybe you do, hey, some people are just looking for a cumdumpster. OP sounds like he might actually want a relationship here.

So you instantly assume that girls who like having a secret admirer aren't worth your time? Generalizing works great.

Again, I'm not telling him to effuse romantic musings and declarations of love. I'm telling him to stop standing in the background wondering whether or not she has feelings for him. I'm telling him to take the first proactive step and say one simple goddamned, "Hello," to initiate a conversation, feel her out (not in the physical sense just yet) and ask her out. And yeah, that has worked for me. It goes like this:

I agree and have said the same thing

Me: "<Conversation opener>"
Her: "<Dialogue>"
Me: "Hey, would you like to grab a bite?"
Her: "Sure."

I would really not suggest asking out a girl you talked to for 10 seconds. A lot of girls will get weirded out that some random guy is asking them on a date. They don't even know you. I would suggest talking to them for a little while so they know they can trust you and then ask to hang out

I didn't need to tell her we can go hit the town like Bonnie and Clyde, and I didn't need to tell her that my ice cream is so totally better than hers omg pajama party. It's very juvenile, mate.

So you seriously think that you will be able to pick up any girl by simply walking up and talking to them for 10 seconds and then asking them out? I'm not saying this won't work as it probably will if a girl is desperate but most girls don't trust random guys and you want to give yourself time to throw some game in before you move it to the next level.

No, see, stop. Stop. What you're doing isn't humor. You are coming dangerously close to the anti-humor; son just this morning I had to tell a fairly well known webcomic author that he's anti-humorous; please don't go further with your "jokes." I don't want to have to break two hearts today.

Umm...ok so do you ever use humor? Or are you going to talk to every date about what you ate for breakfast. That works very well to establish long term relationships. No one needs fun.

I just. God. Is it leaking or something? Did somebody poison the waterhole or some shit? Where's the funny in the world? Where has it gone? Ski mask...appetizers...my God.

The majority of jokes you would say to a girl matter mostly on presentation and you already have a pre disposal to despise anything I write meaning you won't ever find anything I say funny. I challenge you to write something much much better that will relieve an akward pause after asking someone out.

Women are attracted to confidence. He doesn't need muscles or cars to be a man. He needs confidence; more than learning to "handle women" like they're textbook. How the hell are you going to HANDLE a woman when you're too goddamn afraid to say hello?

I have been saying the whole time that he needs confidence I have always said that is one of the biggest factors. But there is way more than confidence...you need to look attractive to them(not "hot" but merely attractice) and have a sense of humor.

Y'all are going to end up making Darkside explain what it is to be a man. Don't make me. There's a song involved. Don't make me break out the song, noobs.

I am curious why being a "man" is so important. What is it that makes someone a "real man"? Cause honestly I think thats a bunch of bullshit. No one needs to try to "become a man" they just need to improve themselves.

Also the PJ movie night isn't meant for a first date, it's after you have gotten the ball rolling and it works wonders. I suggest some of you try it and see how your girlfriend reacts. You can't simply pass something off cause it seems "childish". A lot of you seem to be disilusioned that dates are restricted to some fancy dinner and a movie. That's so cliche your not going to impress any girl. You need creativity and apparently darkside thinks my idea is horrible so I am wondering what creative date ideas you have that aren't childish.

(oh...do note darkside that my arguing is nothing personal...I don't mean to offend)

Suck it up and move on. There isnt anything you can do if she doesnt have feelings for you.

That's not true at all. Too many people think they simply chance into getting a girl. Heck even I have had game worked on me and ended up dating a girl I didn't want to when she first started hitting on me. People don't choose who they like, it just happens so be there to influence your chances as people who are proactive with girls get many many more girls than people who sit around expecting to chance into love.

 

[sinkoman]

Glirk, I think the big problem Darkside has with your ideas, is that they're all synthetic.

With jokes this is a huge ****ing problem. You can't just sit there and think a conversation through in exacting detail. Sure, I plan my conversations ahead of time almost 100% of the time, but that's only the paths they're going to take. I've tried planning an ENTIRE conversation out in my head, and then playing it out, and it always ends up awkward.

If you're going to pre-plan your jokes like how you are saying he should, they will ultimately fail. If something funny comes to you, you say it. You don't try to think of what will or won't be funny.

As for the PJ idea, again, it seems WAY too ****ing synthetic. I mean, sure, of course you need to plan your "dates" ahead of time, but you've got the whole damned thing written out like a movie script.

That's not true at all. Too many people think they simply chance into getting a girl. Heck even I have had game worked on me and ended up dating a girl I didn't want to when she first started hitting on me. People don't choose who they like, it just happens so be there to influence your chances as people who are proactive with girls get many many more girls than people who sit around expecting to chance into love.

The most you can do in a situation like this is hang out with her enough for her to figure out who you are, and then let her decide if she's interested in YOU. Anything more and you're synthesizing the relationship, and when you do that the relationship will fail, MISERABLY.

Hell, like I said, I was pretty much in the same situation as Lambda, and I regret not hitting the eject button.

If you do decide to "pursue" a relationship, don't get too attached. You can't imagine how much it'll ****ing suck for you if you end up hitting the eject button after getting too emotionally involved. It will be PAINFUL to sit there and watch her hit on your best friend. Hell, you might end up losing your "best" friend if you let the anger get to you.

And then there's always the chance that you do get something going with her, but it ends up failing because she's still more interested in your friend than you...

Just remember Lambda, you are the ****ing KING. It's a PRIVILEGE for her to talk to you.

 

[Glirk Dient]

Glirk, I think the big problem Darkside has with your ideas, is that they're all synthetic.

With jokes this is a huge ****ing problem. You can't just sit there and think a conversation through in exacting detail. Sure, I plan my conversations ahead of time almost 100% of the time, but that's only the paths they're going to take. I've tried planning an ENTIRE conversation out in my head, and then playing it out, and it always ends up awkward.

If you're going to pre-plan your jokes like how you are saying he should, they will ultimately fail. If something funny comes to you, you say it. You don't try to think of what will or won't be funny.

I'm not saying to pre plan jokes. I never do..in fact I never really pre plan conversations and it always works out great for me

As for the PJ idea, again, it seems WAY too ****ing synthetic. I mean, sure, of course you need to plan your "dates" ahead of time, but you've got the whole damned thing written out like a movie script.

Again I am not saying pre plan the whole thing...I was merely giving an example and for a night full of stuff...I hardly scripted any of it...just the beginning to get the ball rolling.

The most you can do in a situation like this is hang out with her enough for her to figure out who you are, and then let her decide if she's interested in YOU. Anything more and you're synthesizing the relationship, and when you do that the relationship will fail, MISERABLY.

Hell, like I said, I was pretty much in the same situation as Lambda, and I regret not hitting the eject button.

If you do decide to "pursue" a relationship, don't get too attached. You can't imagine how much it'll ****ing suck for you if you end up hitting the eject button after getting too emotionally involved. It will be PAINFUL to sit there and watch her hit on your best friend. Hell, you might end up losing your "best" friend if you let the anger get to you.

And then there's always the chance that you do get something going with her, but it ends up failing because she's still more interested in your friend than you...

Yeah I agree...it's always a hard call when you start to get emotionally attached. Life sucks that way and theres not much you can do. This is exactly why it helps being able to read the subtle signs girls give off so you can tell if your wasting your time and you can end it before you get too far in or keep trying if you need to.