Internet Dating

meh they're not complaining ...that's right, you're all safe and salty in your little pine box, arent you my love?
 
CptStern said:
meh they're not complaining ...that's right, you're all safe and salty in your little pine box, arent you my love?
Click to expand...

I meant salt on your dick. Then again I never tried it, so I dunno. Once I do I'll let you know how it turns out.
 
CptStern said:
agreed, however thrown into a sarcophagus of salt, they can last for decades. Blow up dolls, however, are susceptible to pin pricks :naughty:


HEY EVERYBODY VirusType2 WANTS A SHEBOY WITH LYME DISEASE!!!
Click to expand...

No, not really, but I'm not ruling it out. :3


Isn't there a name for it? Trap bait? or something?
 
I flirt with everyone I meet, so I don't need to use internet dating sites.
 
My take on Internet Relationships and people saying that they Don't Work In The End.
Nothing works in the end. Sooner or later one of you is going to leave. It might be by choice or it might be by death. So saying that it never ends well is true, but then it's true for everything ever.

So I look at relationships (including those on the internet) like this; they exist in a state of 'working' or 'not working'. If you're happy*, then the relationship is working. If you're not happy, then well, clearly it isn't.
If it isn't working, then you need to change something. Either change some aspect of the relationship e.g. In the case of an Internet Relationship, moving closer to together - or end it and do something else entirely.


*This is crucial. If you're happy, then everyone else can piss off with their ideas about what a relationship should and shouldn't involve. Sure you could be happier, but that's not the point being made right now.
 
I love you Farrow.

My relationship with you is in a state of happiness.
 
I think maybe change the thread title to just 'internet relationships', since I'm finding that (Vegata's specifically) more interesting than Dating Sites, which everybody seems to agree sux0r.
 
Vegeta897 said:
Um wat?

Who is interested in internet relationships that don't turn into real life?
Click to expand...

You, by the fact your too scared to meet a real woman so you talk to a Chinese girl halfway around the world and convince yourself its going anywhere.



ITT nurizeko doesn't understand what a fairly common term means.
Click to expand...

Thats what your mom said last night.

:naughty:




Who would migrate for someone they met online (especially in a case where you are in different countries)? Most people have careers, family, and other obligations where they live. Not to mention you know very little about the real person you are dealing with.
Click to expand...

This.




Most relationships here are mainly all about the sex and they no hardly anything about the person , where as online you get to know the person for who they are, not what they look like :\
Click to expand...

So because some people go out to get sex everyone does right?, nobody ever has thought of meeting a girl face to face for the first time, fostering a relationship, and building something with a bit more groundwork then Mimi-chan666 from the Yahoo! Chinese Culture chatroom or whatever?.


I fully appreciate that Vegeta wants to develop a proper genuine relationship, I just think he's going around it in a pretty dumbshit way.

He's hiding from reality. Theres important life lessons to learn from actually taking the effort to learn about someone you know in real life from the first introduction to where-ever you know.



Didn't say I was moving to China. We don't have any plans, really, but on the contrary we're leaning toward her moving to me.
Click to expand...

Heh, not surprised.



Regardless, its ultimately your choice Vegeta, but I am with No Limit, your going to be burned, badly in my books.
 
Then so be it. I don't see how having relationships that aren't on the internet are going to result in not being burned. Like meeting a girl irl means you won't get hurt..?

Ever since I've met her I've been very happy, and visiting her is going to be one of the best times of my life.

Read Farrow's post.
 
nurizeko said:
...
Click to expand...

I don't want to hurt any feelings or nothing but what he said.

Sure you could be happier, but that's not the point being made right now.
Click to expand...
I think that's excatly the point being made. A hungry kid in Ethiopia will be happy with a few rice cakes because he hasn't experianced anything better. And in the case of internet relationships if you get your hopes up as Vegeta seems to have done the few moments of happiness will be far outweighted by the misery when he finds out it's not going anywhere especially if he does something as stupid as move to china.
 
Vegeta897 said:
Then so be it. I don't see how having relationships that aren't on the internet are going to result in not being burned. Like meeting a girl irl means you won't get hurt..?

Ever since I've met her I've been very happy, and visiting her is going to be one of the best times of my life.

Read Farrow's post.
Click to expand...

Yes, IRL relationships there is a very good chance of being burned. But there is also a decent chance of it actually going somewhere. And if it doesn't go anywhere or if you get burned at least you didn't go half way around the world and changed your entire life around to find that out. I think this is the lesson you should take away here, there are plenty of women our there; don't change your life around because you are desperate for some kind of relationship.

I hate to say it but I can gurantee you that you will never meet up with this girl, this is wishful thinking on your part.
 
internet relationships are almost always built on a foundation of wishful thinking and pre-conceived ideas of what a person may be like. text and the occasional video chat can mislead a person into thinking the person they're talking to is something they're not. it's extremely easy to be misinterpreted using text as a means of communication. there's nothing like a face to face meeting to guage compatibility. the only real difference is that vegeta will need to spend > $3000 to find out what most people take for granted when they meet someone irl
 
No Limit, are being overly pessimistic. You can't guarantee that it won't work at all.

I hardly think a starving kid in Ethiopia is a fair comparison at all. And I also don't accept that you're just trying to suggest to vegeta that there's a better way. You and Nuri are saying that what he has - and indeed what any person has on the internet - is impossible and just basically shitty. But it's not true. I know it isn't true because it has worked in the past and it still works today.

I really don't understand why you guys are being so hard on him or anyone else. He's happy. Why does it offend you so much that he's just not doing everything that you do?
 
Vegeta897 said:
What? Few?
Click to expand...
Compared to how you will feel when you have your feelings hurt yes, few.

I hate to say it but you are talking out of your ass.

You don't know anything about me or my relationship.
Click to expand...

I do know that your e-girlfriend lives in China; I think that's more than enough information for me to make an informed opinion.

Look, I have no intention of getting in an argument with you over this; nothing I say will change your mind. I hope I'm wrong, I hope a year from now you can come back and tell me that. But I'm 99% sure that I'm not wrong on this and the only reason I'm telling you this is because I know you are going to end up hurt over this.
 
Farrowlesparrow said:
No Limit, are being overly pessimistic. You can't guarantee that it won't work at all.
Click to expand...
I can't gurantee that I won't win the lottery tomorrow when I buy a ticket, but I'm pretty damn sure I won't.
I hardly think a starving kid in Ethiopia is a fair comparison at all. And I also don't accept that you're just trying to suggest to vegeta that there's a better way. You and Nuri are saying that what he has - and indeed what any person has on the internet - is impossible and just basically shitty. But it's not true. I know it isn't true because it has worked in the past and it still works today.
Click to expand...
Why don't you accept that I'm just trying to point out to him that there is a better way? That's one of the things I'm trying to point out. The other thing I'm trying to point out is that he will end up hurt over this. I don't know him very well but I'm trying to give him some sound advice. Go back to my lottery anology. Yes, people have won the lottery in the past. But you have to look at the odds and what you are willing to sacrafice for those odds.
I really don't understand why you guys are being so hard on him or anyone else. He's happy. Why does it offend you so much that he's just not doing everything that you do?
Click to expand...

When I see someone I know get behind the wheel of a car drunk after a crazy night of drinking it is my duty to try and stop him even if he is perfectly happy behind that wheel, this is happiness in the short term. That short term happiness can, and most likely will, lead to a lot of prolonged pain.
 
CptStern said:
vegeta will need to spend > $3000
Click to expand...
Nah more about $2000 actually.

No Limit, why is losing a girl over the internet so ****ing horrible and losing a girl in real life not a problem at all? Because that's the way you're painting it. Can you explain this to me? If you ask me, losing her over the internet doesn't sound as bad.
 
Never thought I'd say this, but I'm with No Limit on this one. Knowing a girl over the internet doesn't even count as a relationship. You don't know that person, you can't understand, empathise or bond with them in any meaningful way as the internet can never replace real social contact.

I don't mean this in an insulting way, but I think you're being very emotionally immature and getting far too attached to something that isn't worth getting attached to.
 
I guess we've all said our piece, so there's no need to continue this because we'll keep rehashing it all.
There comes a point where, once you've give your advice, you just have to accept that a man is going to do what he wants to do. Whether he's right or wrong, it's up to him. And he's not risking anything in our lives, so I think it's fair to say that if we really do* have veggie's best interests in mind, then let's just support him in this decision he has made.


*I'm pretty sure none of us do. Myself included lloloolol
 
I had an E-GF when I was 13. By 14 I realized how useless and retarded it was.
 
what gets me is that; what? there's not enough chinese women in your neck of the woods you have to go all the way to china? damn I cant spin a cat without hitting someone from china. hell they even come in different sizes shapes and flavours; a co-worker is half chinese and half fillipino. she's also attractive and best of all she DOESNT LIVE IN CHINA
 
Vegeta897 said:
Nah more about $2000 actually.

No Limit, why is losing a girl over the internet so ****ing horrible and losing a girl in real life not a problem at all? Because that's the way you're painting it. Can you explain this to me? If you ask me, losing her over the internet doesn't sound as bad.
Click to expand...

You just answered your own question. When you lose a girl in person you don't have to spend $2,000 and travel all the way to china. Plus you have much better odds in real life whereas online you have almost no chance.
 
No Limit, Nurizeko, and everyone else: Raise your hand if you've ever actually been in an internet relationship.

/raises hand

I've had two online relationships, and I've had two real-life relationships. My online relationships were just as fulfilling as my real, physical ones. Because, surprise! Relationships are about people, not sex. Ever heard of mutual masturbation? Ever heard of long-distance relationships? Because that's pretty much exactly what an online relationship is, except the two of you are kind of nerdy and thus can spend a lot of time together.

And these aren't borne out of desperation, or a lack of social skills; I can get a girlfriend. My current girlfriend doesn't usually talk to guys as nerdy as me... and is probably more attractive than 95% of, well, girls (not to brag, just saying to make a point). But is that why I'm with her? Hell no. I'm with her because of her personality. I'm with her because we can lie in bed, in each others' arms, talking about nothing for three hours, and then do the exact same thing the next day. I'm with her because we have the same sense of humour, and the same perspective on life. I'm with her because we get each other in a very deep and true way.

Could you perhaps entertain the idea that that's why people start internet relationships?

I mean, really. The fundamental difference between an online and RL relationship is degrees of separation. When you're together, you have a few semi-parallel degrees of separation between each other - your physical bodies, whether or not you're having sex, how deeply you "get" each other on a psychoemotional level. The internet adds two degrees of separation: Distance, and a screen. These degrees force a physical separation between the two, but guess what? Physical interaction isn't what relationships are about, unless you count one-night stands and prostitutes as girlfriends.

I'll say it again: Relationships are about PEOPLE. They're about sharing interests and opinions with someone who very often feels the same way. They're about experiencing things together, no matter how many degrees come between you. They're about connecting, on a level much deeper than simple physical interaction.

But a lot of you can't seem to grasp that.

[edit] And don't come back at me with "but you can lie on the internet!" You can lie in real life too. What if she has a kid? What if she's a serial killer? What if she has four STDs and throws her cats at her neighbours? It makes no difference if you meet her on the internet or in real life, because she's going to lie about that either way.
 
Stigmata said:
No Limit, Nurizeko, and everyone else: Raise your hand if you've ever actually been in an internet relationship.
Click to expand...

I just scored a date on Facebook with a girl I dated a while back for a bit. Does that count? I guess not since she actually lives in my town, not half way around the world. I dated her a few times before and it never went very far and might not this go around, but guess what, that doesn't really affect me that much since that's what happens a lot of times, the difference is I don't have to go half way around the world to find out.

But do what you guys are going to do, but the way some people seem to get attached to an e-girlfriend seems absolutely crazy, if not dangerous (atleast thats my opinion).
 
No Limit said:
I just scored a date on Facebook with a girl I dated a while back for a bit. Does that count? I guess not since she actually lives in my town, not half way around the world. I dated her a few times before and it never went very far and might not this go around, but guess what, that doesn't really affect me that much since that's what happens a lot of times, the difference is I don't have to go half way around the world to find out.

But do what you guys are going to do, but the way some people seem to get attached to an e-girlfriend seems absolutely crazy, if not dangerous (atleast thats my opinion).
Click to expand...
Haha, what?

"but guess what, that doesn't really affect me that much since that's what happens a lot of times, the difference is I don't have to go half way around the world to find out."

See, you can't get away from the notion that we're (mostly speaking for Veggies and myself) desperately latching on to girls on the internet. We don't have to go halfway around the world to find out that the relationship isn't going to work. I never had to travel to find out that my e-lationships weren't going to last. All that had to happen was a change in one of us. One of us meets another person, or our personalities change. And then the relationship is over. Just like any other relationship.

I agree that people can get too attached to girls on the internet. That's the nature of it, when most of the people having e-lationships are social malcontents that have never properly spoken to someone of the opposite sex. But you're generalising. E-lationships are entirely possible, and entirely healthy, so long as you're a rational human being.
 
You know, going half way around the world isn't such a bad thing. I'm pretty sure a breakup could go worse than having a holiday in China or where ever. I've been to meet a few of girls from the internet, and it was always great. And obviously those relationships have ended, but I'm happy that I had them, even if only for the trip to somewhere new.
 
we all know that it could work out for the better. I mean lots things can work out but they dont always work out. ...but the liklihood that it will is at best slim. I'm just here to see the ensuing heartbroken anguish and inevitable trip to china that leads to life imprisonment in a chinese gulag ..the kind you see on 60 minutes. OR if it works out I'll be here to kiss the bride/punch the groom in the face
 
Farrowlesparrow said:
You know, going half way around the world isn't such a bad thing. I'm pretty sure a breakup could go worse than having a holiday in China or where ever. I've been to meet a few of girls from the internet, and it was always great. And obviously those relationships have ended, but I'm happy that I had them, even if only for the trip to somewhere new.
Click to expand...

Another good point people seemed to miss when I said it the first time.

I had planned on traveling to Asia long before I even thought about finding a girl online who lived there.

And Stern you're still not listening. Whether or not the relationship is going to lead to being happily wed for the rest of my life is completely trivial to whether or not I can enjoy the relationship and not regret it in hindsight.
 
Vegeta you should trust their baseless gut instinct that an internet relationship won't work. End it now.
 
He can do whatever he wants, at the end of the day. Personally I think the concept of an "internet relationship" is absurd, and very unhealthy. If using the computer gets to the stage of creating your own alternate reality to live inside, something is wrong.
 
repiV said:
Personally I think the concept of an "internet relationship" is absurd, and very unhealthy. If using the computer gets to the stage of creating your own alternate reality to live inside, something is wrong.
Click to expand...

Very well put.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

MFL
Fascinating look at the ongoing psychological evolution of flat hieirarchies.
Replies
2
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
-smash-
Valve at GDC 2019
Replies
0
Views
25K
-smash-
-smash-
B
Marc Laidlaw releases Half-Life 2: Episode Three's plot
Replies
32
Views
39K
BabyHeadCrab
BabyHeadCrab
B
Community Interviews: Final Exchange development team
Replies
0
Views
5K
Barnz
B
B
Community Interviews: Tony Newton, co-creator of Redemption
Replies
0
Views
5K
Barnz
B
Back
Top