Is my dad cheating on my mom?

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He's part of the NWO and has just gotten the assignment to buttbuttinate Obama?
 
he had his felopian tubes tied...


Ok so il just say it as clear as i can, if you are not interested nor want to read then just dont.
So...my dad is not cheating. The problem is deeper than that. Basically it comes down to my dads job, in which he has a fairly high position. However, the boss for the company which lives in another country has given him hell for the past 5 years. With hell i mean constant abuse, bullying, and just sick authority to make my dad depressed. I wont go into detail, but lets just say that Henrik (the boss) for some reason does everything in power to see my dad fail, and it has worked. This has caused my dad to get a lot of blame from the company, because he is responsible for making sure things go right, but whenever he proposes solutions, Henrik slams it down and tells my dad to do the stuff that will WORSEN his possition, with the threat that if he doesnt, he will be reported to the even higher boss for incapability of following Henriks orders.

This has made my dad sick, real sick. He doesnt enjoy his job anymore, hes powerless, and hes become an alcoholic. Ofcorse he denies it, but he drinks A LOT. Wine bottle after wine bottles goes, nonstop beer and whiskey. This has caused him to loose control of his work, life, and also his economy. Right now we cant almost afford food...he rather spend the money on alcohol. This has angered me and my mom, and he continoualy denies that hes addicted to it. We have tried reason, but he just wont understand. Hes acting weird because hes been hiding alcohol, drinking it behind our backs, throwing away the bottles at the middle of the night (story from first page). How do we know? well my mom did some more spying and talking.

Also, about the cellphone messages, it was actually sent to another boss of his company that shares his dispite of Henrik, and they are arranging a position change of my dad to a lower position where he doesnt have to deal with Henrik, a lower paying job but atleast he can enjoy what he works with and doesnt have to worry about anything, but heres the problem:

WHY BE SO ****ING SECRETIVE ABOUT IT?!?!?!


Alcoholic in deny, lost control of work+family+economy=cant handle his work so he has to be moved to a lower possition=UBER FAIL considering the huge amount of dumb ass loans hes made.


How am i dealing with it? Ofcorse im angered, but as of now i try to be passionate and be friendly, in that way i hope he will see me and understand whats at stake, and straigheten his act up. If i got angry at him and yelled him out, it would probably worsen the problem. Il do a bit of both, and i just hope this doesnt end up in the shitters. It might not sound like a big problem, but when we cant even have a ****ing family dinner together without feeling like each of us has a gun under the table, it does really tear on your everday life.
 
PvtRyan said:
An illness that is only fought by the intake of champagne in a restaurant? :p
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Hmmm, true.
Must be alcoholism.


Edit: oh, snap.


That's a drag man. But at least he isn't cheating on your mum. You guys should try and swallow your anger for now and help him get over the alcoholism. You raging at him will probably just make him more depressed and make the problem worse I guess. Yell the face off him a good few months after he recovers (fingers crossed that he does).
 
Deep down, he's probably horribly ashamed of his alcoholism. That's probably why he's so secretive.
 
Your dad should just talk to the authority above Henrik. Problem solved.
 
But Henrik has the bigger penis. Therefore, when he and the higher authority battle, the latter will lose.
 
you must be relieved, as well as saddened by the turn of events. I hope things turn around for you and your family.





Maybe his boss is gay...
 
tell your dad to make a record of every conversation with herr henrich; emails, messages, phone conversations ..if he's fired or quits out of distress he can sue for ..I cant remember the technical name but it's when a boss makes the employee's life miserable to the point he has to quit ..logging all of the abuse helps document it for later use

oh and you're already judging your father (calling him FAIL becauase he takes a drop in pay; his mental well being is more important) you shouldnt be involved ..at least not directly. Also he needs hel/seems in denial placing blame on henrich for his alcoholism (I'm guessing at this from what you're posted, I dont know the situation so take it with a grain of salt)

but definately dont get involved (directly) as it can sour your relationship with your father (even thinking that he was cheating on your mother made you think differently of your father, respect him enough to trust him to do the right thing)
 
Henrich must die! Kill him, now! Do it for your father!
 
CptStern said:
tell your dad to make a record of every conversation with herr henrich; emails, messages, phone conversations ..if he's fired or quits out of distress he can sue for ..I cant remember the technical name but it's when a boss makes the employee's life miserable to the point he has to quit ..logging all of the abuse helps document it for later use

oh and you're already judging your father (calling him FAIL becauase he takes a drop in pay; his mental well being is more important) you shouldnt be involved ..at least not directly. Also he needs hel/seems in denial placing blame on henrich for his alcoholism (I'm guessing at this from what you're posted, I dont know the situation so take it with a grain of salt)

but definately dont get involved (directly) as it can sour your relationship with your father (even thinking that he was cheating on your mother made you think differently of your father, respect him enough to trust him to do the right thing)
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wise words. My dad has tried to report him for years, but all the other high chairmen of the company likes henrik because "he gets things done, hes a strong leader, everyone likes him"...yeah...thats because if they dont, they get hell. My dad has had the workers under him call him complaining about how Henrik is constantly bashing them and bullying them whenever they try to do their work, but even with all of these witnesses, he cant achieve anything by going against him.

EDIT:


To describe Henrik a little better, hes in the companys HQ and he wants the company to withdraw all their offices around the world to be relocated BACK into sweden (apparantly hes some form of nationalist, he wants to make sure the company is purely swedish, and no im not exagurating, i have seen this guy talk when i was younger). Therefore, he does everything in his power to bring down all offices, which include, giving hell to the workers there, like my dad.
 
*Takes his Chibbing stick and hammers a Nail Threw It*

Lets Do this*Arni Voice*
 
CptStern said:
his mental well being is more important
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This - probably one of the worst things a man can feel is not being able to support his family. However you decide to support your dad, keep that in mind.
 
Sorry to hear your dad is in such a position Rav. I hope things work out for him and you guys.


And I know this is totally irrelevant at this point, but what I was trying to say Darkside was that a father cheating on his wife can really cause bad blood between everyone in the family, which ruins their relationship, and can cause a lot of stress and basically have people growing up without their parents in their lives at all. What I was saying he shouldve done, was confront him and get him to stop being secretive and decietful, and handle the issue in a civil manner. My point wasnt to get him to stop cheating, because frankly, that could be a worse situation. My argument was that he should discuss the matter with his family (or wife solely) and not be a sneak about it.
 
Ravioli said:
WHY BE SO ****ING SECRETIVE ABOUT IT?!?!?!


Alcoholic in deny, lost control of work+family+economy=cant handle his work so he has to be moved to a lower possition=UBER FAIL considering the huge amount of dumb ass loans hes made.
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EXACTLY.

I'm just guessing here, but I'd say he feels that he needs to be a provider for his family; he needs to be stable, he needs to be the rock the family is based upon. And with his alcoholism and his sense of powerlessness, he feels - wait for it - shame.

But he wants to present a brave face to you - though he's not as good at that as he thinks (thought?) - so he tries to hide it. Hide the shame.
 
And I know this is totally irrelevant at this point, but what I was trying to say Darkside was that a father cheating on his wife can really cause bad blood between everyone in the family, which ruins their relationship
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For good reason. Cheating is telling your wife/husband that your years of marriage and relationship and love mean absolute shit and you care that little for the other persons feelings and you have as much respect for them as Nazi has for a Jew.


I've completely cut friends off for less then that (though they were still complete unforgivable wankers), I don't think anyone can be blamed for going into absolute mental shock and emotional break down and screaming down the bastard who has just shattered years of developed trust and love.

But I guess its best to try and be civil and logical about things, but man, TBH, being more angry then you've ever been in your life at a husband for cheating on you is the one time when pure emotion is an acceptable response in my books.













...Also when do we move out?, I've sharpened by sword and stuff.

*waits*
 
Operational said:
Yeah 'cus I'm sure he wants his wife to live in a ghetto, tortured and killed.

I'm so ****ing sick of these bullshit Nazi/Hitler analogies.
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Come on, you don't have to be a Nazi about it.
 
A poor analogy perhaps, but I made my point, cheating on someone your married to is the height of disrespect and automatically makes the person who had the affair the unforgivable bad guy.
 
Operational said:
I'm so ****ing sick of these bullshit Nazi/Hitler analogies.
Click to expand...

I know, right?

From now on let's use metaphors only when referring to hitler and/or jews, and if I see one ****ing similie im going to flip.
 
Yeah, totally flip like a ninja.
 
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