Life's Little Mysteries...

[Brian Damage]

A list of the mysterious facets of everyday life, for all to read and expand upon...

1. Why the toast always lands butter-side-down.

2. Why celine Dion is so popular.

3. Exactly what the Sphinx is smiling about.

4. The nature of the contents of George "Dubya" Bush's cranium.

5. The location and status of Duke Nukem Forever.

6. Why traffic always slows down whenever you're in a hurry.

7. Who's on first base.

8. HL2's release date. And plot. And performance on bottom-range PCs.
And the reason for it's delay. And...

9. What Michael jackson will look like next week.

10. The identity of those green flecks in sausages.

11. Boy George's actual gender.

12. Why what doctors do is called "Practising".

13. What "Floccinaucinihilipilification" means.

14. How much wood a woodchuck would chuck if woodchucks could
chuck wood.

15. Where the bread goes when you put it in the toaster, and where the toast comes from.

16. The plot of both Matrix movies so far.

Ain't life mysterious?

Add your own (in numerical order, if you please)...

 

[Direwolf]

17. What gave George Lucas that brain injury

 

[Brian Damage]

18. What Spam is made out of.

 

[thenerdguy]

19. Why are all the little kids scared of the Ice Cream Man?

 

[Brian Damage]

Hehheh.

20. Why, if nothing sticks to Teflon, the Teflon sticks to the frying pan.

 

[ray_MAN]

21. Why dogs can't talk.

 

[ComradeBadger]

22. Why do people still call themselves l33t h4x0rz, when they are blatently aren't

 

[chu]

23. Why does my belly button smell like poop?

 

[Shuzer]

24. Why hamburgers are made from cow meat, and not pig (ham) meat

 

[CrazyHarij]

25.Why this thread is making me laugh like never before

26.Why the human race is such a cruel and self-devastating race

 

[Alzxul]

27. Why a huge influx of the space time continium would cause a mega nova which then influence a gamma burst which would cause protons to mass around an area of negative energy thus causing a huge flux of ions which would in turn blow something up

 

[bastard_loud]

28. Cheese. And Shoes.

 

[Pressure]

29. Why my belly button smells like poop.

 

[bastard_loud]

30. Deja-vu's.

 

[CrazyHarij]

31. Why Gearbox didn't took time to make Halo for the PC work on a computer just a lil' tad worse than a 4.5 GHZ with that Geforce 9 GTS....

 

[CrazyHarij]

32. Why I have that nasty habit of smelling on my old underpants while changing underwear

 

[Hazza]

I have done my best to answer your mysteries of life, enjoy:

1. "When the problem of toast sliding off a plate or table is examined more carefully - with the toast modelled as a thin, rigid, rough lamina - it turns out that the public perception is quite correct. Toast does indeed have a natural tendency to land butter side down, essentially because the gravitation torque induced as the toast topples over the edge of the plate/table is insufficient to bring the toast butter-side up again by the time it hits the floor." http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/rajm/toast.htm

4. http://education.jlab.org/qa/air_01.html

6. It doesn't.

9. Pretty much the same as he does now, probably.

10. It depends on the manufacturer of the sausage really

11. HE is actually male, although I haven't varified this myself, I'm pretty sure.

13. "FLOCCINAUCINIHILIPILIFICATION (29 letters; an estimation of something as worthless)" http://members.aol.com/gulfhigh2/words11.html

15. The bread turns into toast.

16. The Matrix - "A computer hacker learns from mysterious rebels about the true nature of his reality and his role in the war against the controllers of it." http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0133093/
The Matrix Reloaded - "Neo and the rebel leaders estimate that they have 72 hours until 250,000 probes discover Zion and destroy it and its inhabitants. During this, Neo must decide how he can save Trinity from a dark fate in his dreams." http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0234215/

18. "E-mail spam consists of many copies of the same message sent to individuals." http://www.fau.edu/spam/
"According to the The Amazing SPAM Home Page, the ingredients of SPAM are as follows:
chopped pork shoulder meat with ham meat added
salt (for binding, flavor, and firmness)
water (to help in mixing)
sugar (for flavor)
sodium Nitrite (for color and as a preservative)" http://ask.yahoo.com/ask/20010205.html

22. They like to think they are

23. Maybe you need to wash.

24. Maybe this has something to do with why it's called a hamburger - "In the nineteenth century, German immigrants brought a dish called Hamburg Style Beef to the United States, which had traveled to the seaport city of Hamburg, Germany from Russia. This dish was a raw, chopped piece of beef and is believed to be the primitive ancestor of the modern hamburger." http://bbq.about.com/library/weekly/aa070597.htm?iam=savvy&terms=+origin++hamburgers

 

[nw909]

2873278491274. Who set us up the bomb?

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

2873278491275 why do girls always go to the bathroom together

2873278491276 why do people always feel the urge to greet eachother in the office bathroom

 

[nw909]

2873278491277. Why do the commercials bet I can't eat just one?

2873278491278. Why once I pop I can't stop?

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

2873278491279 why does anyone like square dancing

 

[Hazza]

Aparently the reason why girls go to the toilet together is because it is a place they can have a chat, away from boys (well, in theory at least).

 

[nw909]

2873278491280. Why do I have so many questions?

2873278491281. Are we living in the matrix?

2873278491282. Why while I'm on the computer feel the need to listen to the tv as I surf.

 

[Saltpeter]

2873278491283. Would you still have broken the vase if I hadn't told you so?

 

[CrazyHarij]

NW909: You're not alone on the urge of listening to the TV while using yer comp..

2873278491284. What existed before the Big Bang/God creating the universe ? And before that? And before that?

2873278491285.Why do ppl like spamming?

 

[Shuzer]

Hazza, this thread isn't meant to be serious, as to alot of us know the answers to certain questions, it's for fun

 

[L33731]

2873278491286: Why people insist on smelling there finger after scratching there ass??

2873278491287: Why Fat Chicks still smell like rotting meat after taking a shower??

2873278491288: Why the most sane of people go insane while driving a 10 Ton Vehicle.

2873278491289: Why I am still trying to think of lifes mysteries.

 

[Mitoboy]

2873278491290: If the unviverse is growing at all times and Einstine said that the only thing that is infinite is human stupidity, does that mean human stupidity is greater than the universe?

 

[Saltpeter]

Originally posted by Mitoboy
2873278491290: If the unviverse is growing at all times and Einstine said that the only thing that is infinite is human stupidity, does that mean human stupidity is greater than the universe?

That means that the infinity of human's stupidity is also growing at all times...

 

[Doppelgofer]

2873278491291: why does raw sewage turn into a penguins facial hair?

 

[nw909]

2873278491292. How do I drew blood?

 

[Saltpeter]

2873278491293. Why is chatting on the internet called chatting, and writing on the internet writing?

 

[nw909]

2873278491294. What happens when butan is pressed?

 

[The Dark Elf]

Originally posted by CrazyHarij
NW909: You're not alone on the urge of listening to the TV while using yer comp..

add myself to that too, have no idea why I do it either


oh and this thread is very funny, makes for a great read guys, nice one

 

[nw909]

2873278491295. Why am I listening to montel on my tv? there has to be something better on.

 

[The Dark Elf]

Originally posted by nw909
2873278491295. Why am I listening to montel on my tv? there has to be something better on.

monty python, if your in the UK with cable

 

[aFireInside0016]

get a life?!

 

[burnzie]

2873278491296. why do people tell others to get a life on internet forums when they clearly have no life of their own?

 

[burnzie]

Originally posted by nw909
2873278491294. What happens when butan is pressed?

cant be any worse than the button could it? COULD IT?

*runs in fear

 

[RoyaleWithCheese]

Why does this always happen: I'm sitting at my desk in the office, I look right and left, there's nobody. There hasn't been anybody around for about half an hour. I feel this huge gas bubble creepin' down and yesterday's chili smell fills the room. Then why is it that when I do this, there's ALWAYS somebody standing next to me within 10 seconds and I feel really embarassed and stupid. Especially when it's this hot chick from the sales department..... damn!!!