Post your best joke

[Maxi]

This is a bit rasist...

Why does the mexican olympic team suck?

Because anyone who can either run, swim or jump are already in the US.

 

[Bad^Hat]

What do the KKK and Anabolic Steroids have in common?

They both make black men run like f**k.

Racist yeah, but I stole it from another thread, so if it's okay there *shrugs*

 

[TheSomeone]

chopin wood.

 

[JNightshade]

...huh?

And for a random thought:

I was reading through this thread, for the hell of it... it made me sad. I miss Brian Damage and Farrow ;(


EDIT: Hahahahaha, noooooow I get it

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[Ikerous]

Did you res the oldest joke thread you could find on purpose, TheSomeone? Jesus. We've had loads :|

It was funnier this way
It is a joke thread
it's supposed to be funny.

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[Ikerous]

Everytime youre tired you delete my crap
Wake the hell up!

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[Ikerous]

It's okay, but i'm going to need your soul.
Mere legalities of course

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[Ikerous]

Do I and thesomeone count as all humanity?

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

George Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are flying on Air Force One. The President looks at the Vice President, chuckles, and says, "You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out the window right now and make somebody very happy." The Vice President shrugs and says, "Well, I could throw 10 $100 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy." Not to be outdone, the Secretary of Defense says, "Of course, then, I could throw 100 $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy." The pilot rolls his eyes and says to his co-pilot, "Such arrogant asses back there. Hell, I could throw the three of them out the window and make 56 million people unbelievably happy."

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[TheSomeone]

lmao at ikerous shippi flirting.

 

[madog]

When I become the next Hitler I will kill all the Jews and one clown. State your response to this.


















You say: Why one clown?
Me: See! No one cares about the Jews!
Ya, that is a bad joke but most people say why one clown. Try it yourself.

 

[TheSomeone]

HAHAHAHAHHA XD MADDOG ABSOLUTELY FAILS AT TELLING A JOKE HAHAHA A LITTLE BIT NOT GENIUS AT ALL>




HAHAHAH FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK "STATE YO REPSONSE TO THIS"

lol

 

[TheSomeone]

When playing the piano:

Sweat - every visible drip +10 points
Blood - FURY induced nose bleed +50 points with +10 points bonus for every second you continue playing .
Cum - random unassisted unleashing of ejeculatory fluids + 200points

 

[evil^milk]

When playing the piano:

Sweat - every visible drip +10 points
Blood - FURY induced nose bleed +50 points with +10 points bonus for every second you continue playing .
Cum - random unassisted unleashing of ejeculatory fluids + 200points

lol wtf

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

When playing the piano:

Sweat - every visible drip +10 points
Blood - FURY induced nose bleed +50 points with +10 points bonus for every second you continue playing .
Cum - random unassisted unleashing of ejeculatory fluids + 200points

What about piss? How much is that?

 

[TheSomeone]

-500 points for being a pussy and soiling yourself.

 

[JNightshade]

Hahaha.

*JNightshade tells Shens' joke

 

[Parlez]

-500 points for being a pussy and soiling yourself.

*Blows dust off of Gameshark and restores 500 points*

 

[B_MAN]

knock knock.
who's there?
horsp.
horsp who?

 

[Quixoticism]

Oh man, I saw Ray and Sparrow and got my hopes up...then looked at the post date... ;(

A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he’s allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away.

Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away.

Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "That’s not surprising," the elders say. "You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here."

 

[TheSomeone]

Hahaha.

*JNightshade tells Shens' joke

YOUR FACIAL REGION IS A BEST JOKE LOLj

 

[Sebastian]

Why did the pigeon cross the road?
Because he was having sex with the chicken.

-Knock knock
-who's there
-orange
-orange who
-orange ya glad I didn't say blue

-Knock knock
-who's there
-an interrupting cow
-an interupt.......
-MOOOO!!!

 

[X-FacToR]

 

[ailevation]

Yo momma so fat...

she don't take portraits, she takes posters.

 

[bigburpco]

Once upon a time, AL got bayned.

 

[Remus]

A weird guy is walking down the street with a shoe on a leash, a psychiatrist sees him and goes to talk to him:

Doctor - What a nice dog you've got there.
Crazy guy - What are you insane, that's a shoe!
Doctor - Then why don't you wear it instead of dragging it behind you?
Crazy guy - I'm afraid it will bite me.
Doctor - :|

 

[bigburpco]

What a stupid guy.

 

[el Chi]

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

A man walked into a bar.

Ow.

ANTI-JOKES! WE NEED MORE ANTI-JOKES!

*Sees post date*

Holy crap, someone used the thread defibrilator good and proper...
"But doctor, this thread's been dead and buried for over two years!"
"Not on MY watch! CLEAR!"
*BZZZZT*

 

[jondy]

There are three beekeepers sitting in a bar, discussing their beekeeping habits. The topic moves on to bee/hive ratios, and the first beekeeper begins, 'I keep 10,000 bees in ten hives. I find keeping the density fairly high gives a more consistent honey yield.'

The second beekeeper nods in agreement. 'I keep 30,000 bees in 32 hives for the same reason... a 1000:1 ratio has been proven to increase the quality of the batch, too.'

The third beekeeper says, 'I keep 1 million bees in one small hive.'


'...but isn't that somewhat cruel?'

'Nah. **** 'em.'

 

[el Chi]

I love that joke
Although for full-on room-silencing shock value, change it from bees to orphans and hives to orphanages.

 

[jimbo118]

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

i remember someone posted past that here before, someone sigged it, think it was jondy actually who posted it or maybw jimmeh(whatever hapened to him?)

 

[Remus]

-Knock knock
-Who's there?
-Me
-Me who?
-Me me
-Oh...

 

[Azner]

I think i know how long a person can live without a Brain... How old are you?

 

[el Chi]

http://www.sickipedia.org
God bless b3ta.com

What do you call a black guy flying a plane?

A pilot.

 

[jimbo118]

How do you get a one armed Irishman out of a tree?
Wave.