What's your stance on Child Spanking?

[Solaris]

Because Children are still growing and learning, and they need to know whats right on whats wrong, do you really think it'd get through to the kid if he hit the walls with a hammer and you said "don't do it again." or do you think it'd have a bigger effect if you spanked him. Only spank when you think you should, not just because the kid mouthed off or something, send him/her to their room for something little like that.

Yes I do think there are better alternative methods of disipline than spanking, and I have the weight of conventcional child psychology behind me. You don't teach people right and wrong by doing wrong, you just teach them wrong.

 

[Gunner]

Taxman, what was your old name? I remember the avatar but I forgot your previous nick. Refresh my memory : P

 

[Dog--]

Like I said, most spanking people do/did is wrong, but some things MUST be punished severely.. If your kid started a fire a burnt down a house, what would you do? If your kid drew on the floor with crayons, what would you do? There are not very many things to be spanked for, but there still are some things, regardless of what "experts" and "child psychology" say. I don't think kids learn violence by spanking, the only thing they are thinking about is how much it hurts, and don't want it done to them ever again, therefore they will not do what was done that got them the spanking in the first place. People think children are super smart, some are, but the majority isn't going to think "Oh hey! My parents spanked me, I'm going to go spank everyone else now! My parents punished me, so I'm going to hurt people now!"

 

[ríomhaire]

It's pretty pointless. If you ever watch thoose supernanny programs on tv you should be shot.

Fixed
My parents never hit me except my dad literaly kicked my ass (in front over other people too) when I did something that shall not be mentioned and is not sexual so no stupid jokes.

 

[joule]

Taxman, what was your old name? I remember the avatar but I forgot your previous nick. Refresh my memory : P

The_Monkey

 

[highlander]

never spanked. turned out fine

 

[satch919]

I was spanked and so was my brother. We've never had any behavioral problems. My parents always explained why they did it and they were careful not to use it all the time when I was misbehaving.

Now, in the wrong hands, spanking could be very harmful. That's totally the responsibility of parents to decide when it's appropriate to use that level of punishment.

 

[Solaris]

Like I said, most spanking people do/did is wrong, but some things MUST be punished severely.. If your kid started a fire a burnt down a house, what would you do? If your kid drew on the floor with crayons, what would you do? There are not very many things to be spanked for, but there still are some things, regardless of what "experts" and "child psychology" say. I don't think kids learn violence by spanking, the only thing they are thinking about is how much it hurts, and don't want it done to them ever again, therefore they will not do what was done that got them the spanking in the first place. People think children are super smart, some are, but the majority isn't going to think "Oh hey! My parents spanked me, I'm going to go spank everyone else now! My parents punished me, so I'm going to hurt people now!"

aye what do they know. There only experts :/

 

[Murray_H]

Beating the shit out of a kid - never right.

When they repeatedly do something bad - tap them on the arse.

 

[CptStern]

spanking is more often than not used when the parent is frustrated: it's a sign of a failure in the parent's communication, not the child's

I think some of you need to be parents before you can decide this issue

I have 2 kids and I will never lift a hand towards them ..regardless of the circumstance. Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

 

[Black_Wolf]

spanking is more often than not used when the parent is frustrated: it's a sign of a failure in the parent's communication, not the child's

I think some of you need to be parents before you can decide this issue

I have 2 kids and I will never lift a hand towards them ..regardless of the circumstance. Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

yeah..you got a point..Im 18 and I stil get beat in the head from my dad atleast 2 twice week...just today he hit me again

 

[_Z_Ryuken]

Morel Orel.


That is all.

 

[Sebastian]

spanking is more often than not used when the parent is frustrated: it's a sign of a failure in the parent's communication, not the child's

I think some of you need to be parents before you can decide this issue

I have 2 kids and I will never lift a hand towards them ..regardless of the circumstance. Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

But are your children well behaved or are they out of control?

 

[Raziaar]

spanking is more often than not used when the parent is frustrated: it's a sign of a failure in the parent's communication, not the child's

I think some of you need to be parents before you can decide this issue

I have 2 kids and I will never lift a hand towards them ..regardless of the circumstance. Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

No... I felt like I screwed up bigtime. And it was pretty much because I did.

 

[Dog--]

Beating the shit out of a kid - never right.

When they repeatedly do something bad - tap them on the arse.

That's what I was trying to say. Don't hit them as hard as you can on the ass, but enough to make it hurt, and so they dont do it again.

 

[Cole]

That's what I was trying to say. Don't hit them as hard as you can on the ass, but enough to make it hurt, and so they dont do it again.

I'd also like to state them i'm also implying this.

spanking is more often than not used when the parent is frustrated: it's a sign of a failure in the parent's communication, not the child's

I think some of you need to be parents before you can decide this issue

I have 2 kids and I will never lift a hand towards them ..regardless of the circumstance. Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

Now what if you tell a kid to not do something? He does it, and then laughs.
So you tell him not to do it again? He does it, and then laughs.
So you threaten him in time-out? He does it again, laughs, and runs away.
So you catch him and put him in time-out? Once he gets out, he does it again, laughs?
You make him do chores? He refuses to do them.

I mean a kid like that needs discipline a step furthor then yelling at him and time-outs.

Let me ask of those of you who were spanked ...ever feel humilated after being spanked? it's fear maquerading as discipline. I'm not teaching through fear, it's counterproductive

I really didn't feel anything emotionally but I didn't wanna get spanked again. So I did not do it again.

 

[Raziaar]

Now what if you tell a kid to not do something? He does it, and then laughs.
So you tell him not to do it again? He does it, and then laughs.
So you threaten him in time-out? He does it again, laughs, and runs away.
So you catch him and put him in time-out? Once he gets out, he does it again, laughs?
You make him do chores? He refuses to do them.

I mean a kid like that needs discipline a step furthor then yelling at him and time-outs.

I cannot BELIEVE how many kids I see that do exactly that. They are complete raving lunatics in their desire to disobey. Their parents just stand by helpless. Then sometimes they start screaming their orders again and again. The kid just shrugs their shoulders and keeps doing whatever they're doing.

Or you could just ignore them, let them do whatever they want, and "Respect their decisions."

 

[Bait]

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

I'm surprised this hasn't popped up in this thread yet.

 

[Dog--]

I really didn't feel anything emotionally but I didn't wanna get spanked again. So I did not do it again.

Exactly.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

I'm surprised this hasn't popped up in this thread yet.

I laughed so f***ing hard at that site, Bait!

"I'm hungry, I want toys, I need my Insulin..." etc. First smack your kid (the 5 across the eyes technique works).

That site is awesomely hilarious!

 

[Danimal]

My father pushed/hit me when I was a wee child. And now I fear him. :<

 

[CptStern]

But are your children well behaved or are they out of control?

they're under control (well my daughter is 3 weeks old ..so she doesnt need much discipline) ..trust me it's a lot more work than had I chosen to beat my kids to prove a point

No... I felt like I screwed up bigtime. And it was pretty much because I did.

how about when you were a toddler? it starts somewhere

Now what if you tell a kid to not do something? He does it, and then laughs.

you've already failed as a parent ..discipline doesnt start at that exact moment ..you have to show the child that it is important to listen the first time around

So you tell him not to do it again? He does it, and then laughs.

redirect the behaviour

So you threaten him in time-out?

threatening doesnt work ..at the point anything threat/condition you make he will try to break ..redirect

He does it again, laughs, and runs away.

mutual respect ..if he knows beforehand that it is wrong more often than not he will listen to you ...I have a 2 (almost 3 year old) ..terrible twos, yet his behaviour is easy (relatively speaking, I dont always end up with the upper hand) to manage because my wife and I instilled discipline from the very get go ..you'd be surprised how receptive kids are when you actually bother to explain things beforehand

So you catch him and put him in time-out? Once he gets out, he does it again, laughs?
You make him do chores? He refuses to do them.

at this point you're just escalating the behaviour, pick your battles, not everything has to be an argument

I mean a kid like that needs discipline a step furthor then yelling at him and time-outs.

I dont yell at my kids either

I really didn't feel anything emotionally but I didn't wanna get spanked again. So I did not do it again.

of course you didnt. What you got out the experience was that if you behaved in a certain way you'd get spanked as a result ..not that the behaviour itself was wrong



btw positive reinforcement, proper positive nuturing works far better than corporal punishment ...it's also a hell of a lot more work

 

[Raziaar]

My father pushed/hit me when I was a wee child. And now I fear him. :<

Sounds like you had an abusive father. Not one whose intent was light discipline.

 

[Geogaddi]

Where's the "Highly Arousing" option?

 

[Danimal]

Sounds like you had an abusive father. Not one whose intent was light discipline.

Nah, it's practically the same as spanking. And it was for discipline reasons lol.

 

[Slacker]

I was spanked once because I punched my brother in the face when I didn't beat Bowser on Mario.

 

[myth]

courtesy champchaos
---------------------
james hetfield : beer good, child spanking bad bad bad bad.........

 

[pvtbones]

I'm neutral on the issue. I think the important factor of child raising is if the parents are willing to give a damn about their children and involve themselves and not so much the method of discipline.

 

[myth]

u l'll fethish loving kid.go back to ur class, or i'll spank u too (hmm that was good)

Where's the "Highly Arousing" option?

 

[63]

Words > Violence

 

[myth]

child spanking cant be adopted as an ideal meathod to bring children to proper channel. later on it can even make them aggressive.ARGGGGG!!!

 

[Llama]

The vast majority of parenting books will tell you that spanking a child will cause more social problems down the line than it could ever possibly solve. Just about every parenting expert is against spanking and would tell you that there are plenty of discipline options that do not involve teaching the child that "might makes right" or that "violence solves problems".

Really though, it's a socio-economic thing.

Most parenting books are ****ing rubbish.
Sorry, but personal experience wins out against the advice of some random chump. It doesnt teach you anything about violence, why is this so hard for people to understand.
If used correctly (as a punishment AFTER a verbal warning has been issued with explanation of what has been done wrong) if teaches the child that doing this wrong deed results in a smacked arse.
Social problems? Yeah, of course, we live in a far better society than out grandparents did when they were young :hmph:

Just for the record, I have been hit by my parents several times after doing something wrong (which I know I shouldnt) and I am very grateful for it.

 

[Solaris]

Most parenting books are ****ing rubbish.
Sorry, but personal experience wins out against the advice of some random chump. It doesnt teach you anything about violence, why is this so hard for people to understand.
If used correctly (as a punishment AFTER a verbal warning has been issued with explanation of what has been done wrong) if teaches the child that doing this wrong deed results in a smacked arse.
Social problems? Yeah, of course, we live in a far better society than out grandparents did when they were young :hmph:

Just for the record, I have been hit by my parents several times after doing something wrong (which I know I shouldnt) and I am very grateful for it.

Once again. Watch super nanny. She gets kids who are ****ing crazy, and makes them good, without ever hitting them once.

 

[ComradeBadger]

I was never spanked or diciplined in any way by my parents.. no grounding, etc.

 

[Danimal]

Once again. Watch super nanny. She gets kids who are ****ing crazy, and makes them good, without ever hitting them once.

Oh trust me, she beats the living shit out of them behind the scenes.

 

[Zephos]

Oh trust me, she beats the living shit out of them behind the scenes.

I always thought she bribed them with wads of cash behind the scenes. Another viable theory was that she cloned them and genetically modified the clones creating a superior child.

I'm fine with spanking, cause my parents gave me a warning...if I continued to ignore them then they would give me grounding etc and then spanking if I kept being a asshole...it was always a last resort and it worked well. My sister on the other hand, less spanking and now she's ****ing ignorant. Note: That's just my family, don't be a smartass going "Hey, you're basing your opinion on two people LOLOLOL you got shutdown".

EDIT: Maddox wins

 

[Raziaar]

Nah, it's practically the same as spanking. And it was for discipline reasons lol.

I'm sorry... but if your father PUSHED you... and hit you in any way other than light spanking... that is abuse. Not discipline.

Once again. Watch super nanny. She gets kids who are ****ing crazy, and makes them good, without ever hitting them once.

Umm... they're not her kids for one. Two, the kids haven't been living their entire lives with her, so they wouldn't associate it in the same way as they would a parent.

If you wanted to hire someone to beat your kids, on international television no less... go for maddox, not a british nanny.

 

[Saketi]

i agree, its the only way u can set your child straight nowadays. i was 'spanked' as a child when i was naughty and i havent turned out to see violence is OK.

It has made me think more gratefully towards people, & respect others.

unlike children nowadays, they dont have respect for anyone pr anything, as the LAW isn't tought enough on them, and there is far too many ppl who can't even look after their children. Seen Supernanny, as a prime example.

 

[The Monkey]

If a child does something wrong, he will (perhaps) avoiding the same action in the future. But not because he thinks what he did is wrong, but because he's afraid of the ounishment. You have to teach a kid why it is wrong to, for example, steal. You have to make them afraid of the act itself, not the punishment that follows. That's the only way to teach them right from wrong.

 

[Krynn72]

Not Spanked:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZ1ZMJu37q8

Spanked:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bi7Yeujm2H8

 

[Solaris]

If a child does something wrong, he will (perhaps) avoiding the same action in the future. But not because he thinks what he did is wrong, but because he's afraid of the ounishment. You have to teach a kid why it is wrong to, for example, steal. You have to make them afraid of the act itself, not the punishment that follows. That's the only way to teach them right from wrong.

:cheers: