Make a Wish, and have it corrupted - Half-Life Edition

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Granted, it stops twitching, then it explodes and you buy a turtle for a new pet because they pwn hamsters.

I wish I can breathe in water. (Played too much of Aquaria lately)
 
Granted, but you are caught by a fisherman and the fisherman eats you for dinner.

I wish that all the peoples wishes could come true.
 
Granted, but everyone disappears (because of atomic_piggy's wish).

I wish I get a Wacom tablet for Christmas.
 
granted, merry cristmas. it kills your family

I wish the halo game never was made.
 
Granted but Halo fans come play HL2 and are really nubby and you commit suicide from their annoyingness. (My worst fear)

I wish I was dead.
 
Granted but Halo fans come play HL2 and are really nubby and you commit suicide from their annoyingness. (My worst fear)

I wish I was dead.

Granted, but the Vortegauns (How do you spell it?) bring you back to life.


I wish that in Episode 3, Striders DON'T come with the damn hunters.
 
Granted, they send stalkers accompanied by scanners in the final battle, then noobs start complaining, that combine are dumb. And the world explodes...

I wish the school starts going to me, instead of me going to school!
 
Granted, but it's only a replica because someone already wished for the real thing.

I wish people would come up with original wishes.
 
Granted (Continued)

I wish for a Real life TF2 replicca game.
 
Continued?

Granted, but you get murdered in the onslaught and can't play it.

I wish people would come up with original wishes.
 
Granted, but you fall in love with a doctor, who had built a time machine. So you travell back to 1971, fall in love with a Gabe as a child and then have hot threesome together with him, Doc and you...there for you create a time paradox that couses you to never exist...

I wish that the cake was a lie...
 
Granted, but you have nothing to eat and die. :(

I wish that I could wish to wish to not wish to wish to possibly wish without with wishing.
 
Granted. You cause a paradox and die.

I wish I had the intelligence of Kleiner
 
Granted, but you can't use it because you are already working at the drive-thru at McDonalds.

I wish that my next wish comes true.
 
Granted. Your next wish will come true (but NOT on the way you might expected)

I wish for a cheeseburger without cheese. (NO! Not hamburger! Cheeseburger without cheese!)
 
Granted, because I'm working at the drive-thru. But I dislike you, so I spit on it :)

I wish wish for a raise.
 
Granted, but you can't have one.

I wish that I could learn how to exist properly. I'm sorta in between dimensions here. Need to learn more existance skills.
 
Granted but you become bored of your boring life and commit suicide.

I wish I had a nucleoid pig
 
Granted, but your pig dies of Cancer


I wish I had time for this!1!!!
 
Granted, he goes haywire and kills you

I wish I had more food.
 
Granted, but you eat too much and now can't fit in your computer chair.

I wish nothing.
 
Continued?

Granted, but you get murdered in the onslaught and can't play it.

I wish people would come up with original wishes.

Continued as in i made my own original wish for you :p
 
no wish? Okay.

I wish I had 5 minutes with Gman alone in a room with a chainsaw.
 
Granted, Gman teleports out of the room, and then compresses the room together thus killing you inside...

I wish I knew how much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood.
 
Wood Chuck would chuck as much wood Wood Chuck could chuck wood

I wish i had a Milky Way Midnight Bar. :)
 
Granted, but one triumphs and pulls its mask of. Its Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris kills you.

I wish Uni would last longer. Its so much awesome.
 
Granted, you die in uni.

I wish I was never born?
 
Granted, there's no need for wishes like that, just go and cut yourself and it'll all end...


I wish I could fly.
 
Granted, but then you get shot down by the CIA.

(How is this Half Life Edition when all of the wishes have NOTHING to do with Half Life?)

I wish for Half Life three to have Adrian Shepherd.
 
Granted but then you get mobbed by thousands of angry fans for wishing it.

I wish I was a member of Valve
 
Granted, you are Gabe's (5ex) slave and biatch and crowbar holder, and you don't get paid, and you don't get to see any spoilerific materials.

I wish for a new weapon in episode three.
 
Granted, but it's a dual wield gravity gun, which is useless. :p

I wish for Gordon freeman to have a voice.
 
Granted, he sounds like a chipmunk.

I wish I can kill hunters with my own bare hands.
 
Granted, but you can only kill the retarded hunters (you monster)

I wish that they could make a half life movie (doesn't have to be with Gordon)
 
Granted, but it is awful, Gabe Newell is assassinated, Valve collapses and another one is never made.

I wish I could build my own species of people.
 
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