Understanding females - Hl2.net verison

[Taboo]

He did bone that one hooker.

Dan Brown told me so.

 

[Glirk Dient]

Erm... what's the age range of the women you are trying to... "lure"... with a PJ movie party that includes ice cream?

Not accusatory, really just sickly fascinated.

Anywhere from 18-24. Most girls find things like that a lot of fun. It has much better results than going out to a movie/dinner as that is so cliche it's boring. I like to make first couple dates more unique and out there so it is also more fun.

 

[TechnoHippyChic]

I guess I'm a little late to this thread, but

What's that, six girls on HL2.net that we know of?

Cool beans. Equality is on the rise!

11 by my count. We are legion (out of 10,000 )

And Darkseid, I think you may be surprised at the number of women who might have an "un-girly" name, if only to keep from being fapped over so much.

Anyway, I stopped trying to figure out humans long ago, male or female. Glad I'm not human. I'm strange in that I enjoy being a solitary recluse...

Edit: Oh and:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tqf9PuKi63E

 

[Phobie]

I'm so gay for that song.

 

[Druckles]

- The obsessive ones. Another big category, these gals tend to stick in terrible relationships because they're scared of being alone. When you hook up with one, within a week she's telling you she loves you and emotionally blackmails you if you even hint that you're not happy in the current relationship. They tend to marry very young. This is a kind that tends to be attracted to me, for some reason.

Unflushables

- Chav girls. Don't go near them, because you'll catch something nasty.

Urgh... too many of them *shudders* And they all look like marshmallows or stripey tubes of lube.

- The untouchable croud, type 1. These girls are quite happy to be your friends, and would probably be everything you'd ever need as a girlfriend, but you're just a friend. And that's all you'll ever be. Worse, they'll fancy your brother, or go through a string of crap boyfriends and tell you everything about it.

It seems like everyone's like that.

- Women who would actually be the right person for you. A purely theoretical construct.

Don't talk out of your arse

Disclaimer: This is an oversimplification of women, and is not intended to be offensive to our resident wimmenz. Who would probably be untouchable type 1s if you met them offline.

Funny. It's barely an oversimplification. It's summed up almost any category that any female could be. And you've done it really well!

Although I met my last girlfriend of the internet... which is quite a strange story.

 

[sinkoman]

Although I met my last girlfriend of the internet... which is quite a strange story.

You've suddenly stopped being cool to me.

As for AL's list, you must remember that for every female category, there is a corresponding male one.

Does anybody else shudder at the thought of what "category" they may be simplified into as much as I do?

 

[Eejit]

Geeks (Us?)

Man-whores (Top Man wearing clones)

Violent with Issues

Overly Clingy

Completely self-centred



... off the top of my head. Some overlap obviously.

 

[MJ12]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tqf9PuKi63E

got that right sister

 

[Druckles]

You've suddenly stopped being cool to me.

It's not quite as sad as it appears. I happened to be talking to a friend from school over msn when these two friends of his showed up. One of them took over his computer while the other chased him round the room with a guitar. I continued to talk to her over msn for several months before ever actually meeting her. Funny thing is, I knew her sister but didn't know they were sisters. And I knew both guys who were going out with them at the time. All very strange.

As for AL's list, you must remember that for every female category, there is a corresponding male one.

Does anybody else shudder at the thought of what "category" they may be simplified into as much as I do?

I was just thinking that at the moment I read it. Urgh, I'm just not going to think about it any further *blanks mind*

 

[sinkoman]

Geeks (Us?)

Man-whores (Top Man wearing clones)

Violent with Issues

Overly Clingy

Completely self-centred



... off the top of my head. Some overlap obviously.

Prettyboys- have a knack for catching women who are in it for nothing but the sex. Poor bastards usually actually think they have a decent relationship going with the girl till BAM! Time for a new boy toy.

Geeks that are desperate for love- Occasionally muster the guts to venture into the female world, and manage to charm a tart or two (i've noticed they have a knack for attracting whores). Usually either the geek got lucky and actually found a skank that likes him, or the bitch is just toying with him. Either way, bitch doesn't stand a chance. He'll refuse to break up with her.

Gangsta foos- Yo yo digity do dawg... Get more tail than they deserve.

Whip bearers- Bitch, why da **** you been talkin to Garry, HUH? YOU BEEN CHEATING ON ME YA DAMNED WHORE??!!??!!

Untouchable crowd1?- god knows these folk may not even exist. I don't have the vagina to accurately depict them. I think this is the guy everybody HOPES they are...

Untouchable crowd2- Too good for women. Possibly gay.

Guys who are actually right for somebody- Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

 

[Druckles]

I think you should get a vagina on that list. See if they can work it up.

 

[Darkside55]

Girls don't want a nice guy. They want somebody who is cooler than themselves and fun.

You're close.

Girls don't want a nice guy, but they don't necessarily want someone "cooler than themselves and fun." What girls want--and if you take any advice from this thread, let this be it--girls want an asshole. A complete and total misogynistic jerk.

Now listen, probably the resident women are going to come up in here and tell you that that's not true, they want this and that from a man--they're liars. What girls really want is a boyfriend who is a complete jerk. Someone who insults them. Someone who stands them up at dates. Someone who doesn't give a shit about their opinion. Basically they want a bad boyfriend.

But there's a trick to it. You have to sort of layer yourself...you're an asshole on top, but deep down you've got a sensitive side that you never show, you just hint at it. Always keep it out of reach, ALWAYS. But hint at it. Give her something to work towards.

See, I know a lot of men out there wonder, "How does that jerk get the girls? I'm a sensitive guy and I'll listen to a woman, I'll have meaningful conversations with her, we have so much more in common, blah blah blah." Man, she doesn't want you. You put all the things she wants up front! You know why women say they want a guy who treats them good, has a good sense of humor, is kind and compassionate and listens to them, but they go with the complete opposite? It's because they want the benefits of having the rebel, PLUS they all have some innate need to change a man into their ideal. They think they can bring out those qualities in their significant other if they just work at it.

"Girl I know deep down he loves me."
"He just acts that way in front of people but he really cares."
"You don't see his sensitive side. When we're alone, he's different."

A girl will hang off an asshole's nuts, for real. NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY, she'll stick around. Take my advice. I've got the first-hand reports on that one. As a sensitive guy I was like...I got girls who found me endearing, I got dates, but nothing ever worked in the long-term. Nothing ever really worked in the short term. After a particularly bad incident I was just like, "Man, f*ck this, I'm not going to put up with this anymore."

Now I'm goddamned Deuce Bigalow. I was talking to Greenkata the other day (who, admittedly, is a much more magnificent asshole than I am), and I says to him in front of some of our other friends, "Man, Green and I got a serious case of 'whodisbitch.' It's a condition where we don't know who these women are that keep saying they know us and want our number." Women love an asshole. There's your grand advice for understanding women.

And Darkseid, I think you may be surprised at the number of women who might have an "un-girly" name, if only to keep from being fapped over so much.

It'd be a good plan if most of them didn't inevitably ruin it by announcing that they're women anyway.

And it's not that I think women should just be quiet about their gender period, but it's the context in which most women talk about it. "I'm a female on this forum and my opinion blah blah blah." Man, there was a girl on THIS forum who said once to me and some other guys, "You should be happy there are more women on this forum," like that mattered at all. It's the way they announce it. It's more, "My opinion matters because I am female," or "I'm female so pay attention to me," or "I represent all females and this is what females think." More than a man would just say, "This is my opinion." Rarely do I ever see a guy say, "This is the opinion from a male perspective," as if his gender somehow lent more credence to his opinion.

 

[Phobie]

Are any of the other girls finding this utterly ridiculous?

 

[Darkside55]

Don't get mad because I spilled the beans, Phobes.

 

[Druckles]

No. However annoying it is, it's the hard truth. I've experienced it first hand.

Oh, and I just had an epiphany.

 

[CrazyHarij]

darkside: you should stop chasing psycho bitches

 

[GreenKata]

darkside: you should stop chasing psycho bitches

Darkside and me love psycho bizatches.

 

[Asknoone]

Darkside has lost the plot.

 

[Darkside55]

*Pats Samon on the head*

One day you'll learn.

 

[firenbrimstone]

Are any of the other girls finding this utterly ridiculous?

Sadly, I don't think it's all that far off the mark...for a large percentage of women.

Women have a deep need to try and "change" the men they are with.. they THINK they see some sort of goodness, just below the surface. With a little bit of coaxing, THEY can be the one to bring it out.

It's crap. But, it's true.

So yeah, while I'm completely disgusted by it, I can't say it's ridiculous by any stretch.

It's all just a bunch of headgames and Jedi mindtricks anyways, nobody wins and inevitably someone just gets an arm severed off. Metaphorically speaking, of course.

 

[Phobie]

I think I'm just a bit sad that everyone is generalized so much. "Men want nothing more than sex", "woman are scheming and manipulative, and they all want to date assholes".

I'm not saying I haven't dated some complete assholes, and I'm sure I can be manipulative, I just don't think that anyone can be categorized like that. It's got nothing to do with judgement from the other sex, it's just a human thing I guess.

 

[CrazyHarij]

loads of ****ed up chicks, ill give ya that. good to be reserved and all, but me dont thinks it necessary to get cynical. the difficult part is staying clear of the relationships that end up being shit for you, but once you find out, the psycho bitch prolly already got the most of you. life's too short for that stuff. keep it on a superficial level.. if it works, great, if it doesnt, gtfo. have some fun inbetween and everybody's happy. peace

 

[firenbrimstone]

I think I'm just a bit sad that everyone is generalized so much. "Men want nothing more than sex", "woman are scheming and manipulative, and they all want to date assholes".

Don't be sad, at least you know what myths and lies you're up against! Knowledge is power, so they say. Lumping all women or all men into one category is simply just easier to do, especially during a debate where you only have a sliver of actual truth and experience.

Woman or man, be a bit of everything. Seriously, make it so damn hard to be categorized, peoples' heads pop off. That'll show 'em.

Oh, and yeah... stay clear of the crazy bitches. There are plenty of crazy assholes that would match up with them perfectly. I saw it on Jerry Springer, so it has to be true.

 

[Baal]

What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger

Unless you're a wimp who doesn't know how to learn from mistakes / learn from the past in general

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[CrazyHarij]

baal, youre not being realistic at all.. wimp? whose mistake is it if you get used by someone you care about? these things can **** a man up and i won't blame them. but it's all about your approach. if youre comfortable with yourself as single it won't be the whole world if/when things go wrong. just dont let it take the best of you, you dont need anyone's baggage

 

[Darkside55]

I think I'm just a bit sad that everyone is generalized so much.

...

I'm not saying I haven't dated some complete assholes, and I'm sure I can be manipulative, I just don't think that anyone can be categorized like that.

Generalizations and stereotypes come from somewhere. Nobody likes to hear that, no matter what the stereotype is, but that's the truth. These opinions aren't coming out of the woodwork, they're not unfounded. Generalizations are formed by watching repeated patterns across a specific group of people; if it weren't true then the stereotype wouldn't have any backing.

That's the truth of the world.

stay clear of the crazy bitches

Impossibility. There is no such thing as an un-crazy woman, they all exist along a degree of craziness. It's a linear line that runs from, "Has slight issues, normal for any human being," to "This bitch will cut you I swear to God you will wake up and your detached testicles will be resting on your pillow."

I am certain such a line exists for men as well, although we're more grouped into one extreme end or the other, rather than spread out along the line as women are. Which is why we can't understand what's wrong with them sometimes, and vice versa.

 

[firenbrimstone]

It's a linear line that runs from, "Has slight issues, normal for any human being," to "This bitch will cut you I swear to God you will wake up and your detached testicles will be resting on your pillow."

I hate you. Not really, but... I hate that I really wanted to argue your point, but I simply can't.

Well, I could. But then I'd have to put the knife down.

 

[CrazyHarij]

dside speaks the truth but i ****ing hate to agree with it

 

[Phobie]

Kind of. But some girls do only go for the assholes, like my friend. She's been screwed over so many times it's ridiculous. Yet she keeps on ending up with the same kind of guys. She says that "the next one will be better!" but they're all the same. She did date a couple of nice guys but she broke up with them because it didn't "feel right". So, there is some validity to the girls like assholes thing :/

I've been screwed over a fair share of times too, and it never gets easier. I don't *like* assholes but somehow always seemed to end up with them. I think that's sad, about your friend and I really hope she finds someone who is good to her, but maybe there's some underlying issue she needs to deal with? Hm that sounded rude, I don't know how else I mean to put it. I mean, maybe she goes for the same guys for a reason that she doesn't understand.

Or she actually does just like the asshole thing.

 

[Druckles]

Metaphorically speaking, of course.

You think it's metaphorical do ya? You ever wondered why it takes me three times as long as anyone else to type??

 

[Baal]

baal, youre not being realistic at all.. wimp? whose mistake is it if you get used by someone you care about? these things can **** a man up and i won't blame them. but it's all about your approach. if youre comfortable with yourself as single it won't be the whole world if/when things go wrong. just dont let it take the best of you, you dont need anyone's baggage

All I am saying is that don't be afraid to take chances just because "it could hurt you"

 

[Phobie]

All I am saying is that don't be afraid to take chances just because "it could hurt you"

/highfive

 

[CrazyHarij]

thats absolutely true. cheerio

 

[Phobie]

Of course, you also have to consider how many times someone can get hurt without being turned into a smouldering wreck of a person. I'm pretty sure the threshold is different for everyone.

I've yet to find my number! I guess my threshold is pretty high

 

[repiV]

Sadly, I don't think it's all that far off the mark...for a large percentage of women.

Women have a deep need to try and "change" the men they are with.. they THINK they see some sort of goodness, just below the surface. With a little bit of coaxing, THEY can be the one to bring it out.

It's crap. But, it's true.

So yeah, while I'm completely disgusted by it, I can't say it's ridiculous by any stretch.

It's all just a bunch of headgames and Jedi mindtricks anyways, nobody wins and inevitably someone just gets an arm severed off. Metaphorically speaking, of course.

That's not quite true. The reason that women tend to go for jerks is because they actually provoke some kind of emotional response, whereas "nice guys" don't. Negative emotions are more exciting than boredom.
It's entirely possible to be attractive without being a jerk - think "alpha male". The more value or perceived value (dominance, confidence, status etc.) you have as a man, the more attractive you are to women - you're the boss, people look up to you, you don't give a damn what anyone else thinks because you KNOW you're cool, etc...
Of course most guys go throwing money at a woman, which is the quickest way to tell her your thoughts - "I don't think I deserve you, so I'm going to bribe you into spending time with me". The first step is believing that she's lucky to have the chance to spend time with you, rather than the other way around...and that you've gotta do what you want to do, not what she wants you to do.

Now keep in mind there are a whole lot more jerks on this planet than alpha males, and that's why it seems that women are inherently drawn to jerks. And also why 5% of the men get 90% of the women.

Which all makes it really damn hard to be the man as required in the era of equality.

 

[CptStern]

pfft you guys are wasting time trying to understand ..I've been at it far longer than most of you and I still dont understand them ..I've just come to the conclusion of why bother? they're different than men, as long as I can accept that and learn to at least anticipate what they want then there's no problem


anyways the majority of you are at an age that if you have to sit down and think about why the woman in your life is difficult to understand it's time to move on to the next one ..life's too short to waste time on questions you cant possibly answer

 

[Druckles]

anyways the majority of you are at an age that if you have to sit down and think about why the woman in your life is difficult to understand it's time to move on to the next one ..life's too short to waste time on questions you cant possibly answer

You're suggesting we don't stick with the same girl for more than a month? Because that question will always come up.

 

[Pesmerga]

Women are a lot like... guacamole.

CptStern is right about this, folks- women, love, and all that jazz are something learned in time. It's hard to give specific advice because each person is different, and sometimes even general advice like "Be the alpha male" can be a little misleading.

There are innocent relationships out there, and there are people who just want to have a companion and not screw them over. There are some women who fall in love with absolute dorks, or some men who find beauty where others only see mediocrity. There's not a lot one can say to help people, but I think I have one piece of advice that applies to everyone-

do not be afraid to do the right thing.

 

[CptStern]

You're suggesting we don't stick with the same girl for more than a month? Because that question will always come up.

depending on age of those involved and where they are in life ..save serious relationships for when you're ready, have fun now


disclaimer: always wear a condom kiddies